Garbage Man Comic Strips - Page 16

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View 151 - 160 results for garbage man comic strips. Discover the best "Garbage Man" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags unfunded man date, my delivery, no one laughs, unemployed guy

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Tina: I went to a movie with an unemployed guy. I call that an unfunded man date. The unemployed guy didn't laugh either, Maybe its my delivery,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags doctor dogbert show, big woman, little man, tv show, freak show, man, hot dog bun, doll like husband, interview, tv camera

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Doctor Dogbert Show Dogbert: Today we'll meet a couple who have a common problem. Big woman: I make him sleep in a gigantic hot dog bun. Dogbert: Can I see it? Man: No... please big woman: And the problem is that he snores.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dogberts ad agency, research, don't use prodcut, outdoors, indoors, intensive ad campaign, outdoors for losers, humming birds, man in garden, happiness of gullible people, science

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Caption: Dogbert's ad agency" Dogbert stands on a table holding a pointer. Dogbert says to The Boss and Dilbert, "According to my research..." Dogbert says, "...People don't use your products when they are outdoors." Dogbert gestures to The Boss, "Somehow we must keep people indoors." Dogbert flips a page on a display notepad. Dogbert says, "I recommend an intensive ad campaign..." Dogbert continues..."Featuring this slogan..." The pad reads, 'Outdoors is for losers.' Dpgbert says to Alice, Dilbert and The Boss, "The tv spot will show humming-birds attacking a man in his garden." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Wouldn't that destroy the happiness of gullible people?" Dogbert says, "We'll tell them it doesn't."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company lawyer, contract, reasonable man, interpretation, squash, bug

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"Company Lawyer." "This contract would be subject to a 'reasonable man' interpretation." "Where is this guy? I'll squash him like a bug!" "Okay, moving on..." "It's you! I knew it!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hit man, killed, cover tracks, endless cycle, all free

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"The trouble with hiring a hit man is that you have to have him killed to cover your tracks." "Then you need a hit man to hit the guy who killed the hit man. It's an endless cycle!" "But ultimately, it's all free, right?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new vice president, billon dollars, garbage barge, oceanfront realestate, open business, barge

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"I worked all year on a project that got canceled today because we got a new vice president who didn't like it." "I made a billion dollars by convincing suckers that a garbage barge was oceanfront real estate." "Would you lend me some money so I can open my own business." "No, but I know some people on a barge who would."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags gadgets, mobile (cell) phones, time travel, rumour, apple phone, 20 pixel camera, picture of thoughts, time machine, future, most handsome man, android phone

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Dilbert: I heard a rumor that Apple's next phone will have a 20-megapixel camera. Topper: That's nothing! I heard you'll be able to hold the phone to your head and take a picture of your thoughts. And even that's nothing. Their next phone will be a time machine! Future Topper: Here I am from the future! I'm the most handsome man in the universe! Topper: So am I! Wally: He makes a good case for buying an Android phone. Both Toppers: I love me more than me. Topper hijack

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags automobiles (cars), restoring old cars, less useful, garbage, cars

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Coworker: My hobby is restoring old cars. Dilbert: That strikes me as slightly less useful than Wally's hobby of doing absolutely nothing. Wally: Do you restore other kinds of garbage or just cars?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags do nothing robot, lazy, replacement, robot, similar to man, uncomplicated, websites, coffee drinker

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The Boss: I bought a robot to replace you. All it does is drink coffee and look at inappropriate websites. The boss: Did I forget anything? Wally: No, I not a complicated man.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, project team, foul stench, stink of failure, follows man

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Man says, "You must be Dilbert. I'm the new guy on your project team." Dilbert says, "What's that foul stench?" Man says, "It's the stink of failure. It follows me around from project to project." Dilbert says, "How do I get if off?!!" Man says, "You can dilute it by shaking hands."