Personal Storage Unit Comic Strips - Page 16

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

178 Results for Personal Storage Unit

View 151 - 160 results for personal storage unit comic strips. Discover the best "Personal Storage Unit" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #hacking, #illegal, #support, #technology, #diagnose computer problem, #remotely, #spam server, #snoop files, #pilfer bank act.

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's tech support Dogbert: May I remotely take over your computer to diagnose the problem? Now hold while I snoop into your personal filed, pilfer your bank accounts and turn your computer into a spam server. Client: THAT'S ILLEGAL! Dogbert: So are 75% of your personal files, but you don't see me getting all huffy.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad news, #awkward, #funny face

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "A salesman borrowed the demo unit that you flew across the country to see." Man says, "Can I show you something totally irrelevant so this doesn't feel so awkward?" Dilbert says, "Give me a minute to get out of the splatter zone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #present, #software engineer, #give, #program, #product, #box, #hand, #receive, #look, #Features, #criticize, #depressed, #first copy

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "As lead software engineer, I give you the first unit of our ten thousand copy production run." Dilbert says, "Wow! I wish we'd designed it with the features listed on the box. That would have been awesome." The Boss says, "What?" Dilbert says, "I'll put this with the other reminders of how my life could have been excellent."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #consult, #customer data, #complain, #sell, #identity thieves, #foot in mouth, #check

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "Customers are complaining that we sold their personal data." Man says, "And apparently all of the buyers were identity thieves." The Boss says, "That's impossible. We checked every buyer's ident? oh."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ridiculous, #waste, #time, #pointing, #useless, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "Someone borrowed the unit you asked to see, so I'll show you pictures of models you aren't interested in." Man says, "There's one you don't want?And you sure don't want that one?" Dilbert says, "And how does this help?" Man says, "Would you like a CD of products we no longer carry?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #phone, #lunch, #talk about products, #reject, #woman, #attractive

View Transcript

Transcript

Carl says, "Let's have lunch so I can tell you about our products." Dilbert says, "No thanks." Dilbert says, "I don't like meeting new people." Dilbert says, "Every person I meet chips away at my freedom." Dilbert says, "If I have lunch with you, I'll feel an obligation to return your pestering phone calls." Dilbert says, "My lunchtime is the only chance I get during the day to scrape off the leeches." Dilbert says, "Nothing personal." Woman says, "Do you want to have lunch and discuss our new product line?" Dilbert says, "Sure!" Dilbert says, "Carl, you are totally in the wrong profession."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Every company needs goals." GOALS "We have division goals, department goals, district goals, personal goals and affiliate goals." "You will all attend a four-hour training session on how to write goals." "Every week you will report on how you are doing compared to your goals." "Those reports will be entered into a giant database." "Won't the size and complexity of the database make it impossible to know what's really happening?" "Yes. That's why your raises will be based on what you look like." "Bummer for you."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"This is Dogbert's tech support. How may I abuse you?" "I get an error message every time I open an application." "Try giving me all of your personal information and then checking into rehab." "Then I'll have someone steal your identity and move in with your wife." "There's a good chance that the new guy will know how to fix your computer." "When you get out of rehab, talk your wife into taking you back." "Then never touch your computer again because it hurts the ones you love." "How's work?" "Everyone wants to talk to my supervisor."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee appreciation day

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: We're going to have an employee appreciation day on the 8th! "That's a Sunday." Alice: That's the best day for a potluck lunch. The Boss: You'll have all day Saturday to make a dish to share!" "I'll need a volunteer to organize everything. Let's see...Which one of you is the woman?" "Bring jackets. It's supposed to be about 45 degrees in the park that day." "I won't be able to attend because I do personal stuff on weekends." "Take pictures!" I hope no one else brought a pine cone appetizer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #negative commentray, #blog, #fire, #freedom of speech, #our founding fathers, #spitting on graves, #not good work, #final paycheck

View Transcript

Transcript

"Ted, you've been saying negative things about the company in your personal blog. We have to fire you." "I have freedom of speech. It's my constitutional right to say whatever I want." "If you fire me for my opinions, you'll be spitting on the graves of our founding fathers." "I'll get the best lawyer that money can't buy, and fight you all the way to the Supreme Court!" "The only way you can legally fire me is if my work isn't good." "Ooh. I probably said too much here." "Your work isn't good. Here's your final paycheck." "Stupid founding fathers."