Hot Stock Tips Comic Strips - Page 17

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

250 Results for Hot Stock Tips

View 161 - 170 results for hot stock tips comic strips. Discover the best "Hot Stock Tips" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, this is Ellen, your new natural enemy." "You're highly skilled but mannish, whereas Ellen is unqualified and totally hot." "Now I have to decide who will come with me to the trade show in Hawaii and who will do the furniture inventory."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Did you hire Ellen just because she's hot?" "Carol, hotness is an important skill. It's like a super power." "From now on, how much are you charging us for printer cartridges?" "Fuh fuh free!" ping

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

That new employee is getting special treatment just because she's hot. It's unfair. "She's hot? Where is her cubicle? Maybe I should bring her some coffee." "Do you mind brewing an extra pot? I don't know how big her mug is."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"The new employee at work is hot, and she's getting special treatment. How can I get rid of her?" "Water finds its own level. She'll leave within a week." "They say that most people meet their future spouses at work." erk!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Dilbert, meet Albert. He's old, but I like to call him experienced." "I'm trying to win an award for being one of the best places to work if you have one foot in the grave." "I'm only 54. I ran a marathon yesterday." "I asked the cafeteria to stock up on food that's easy to gum."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #25 each, #cheap hot dogs, #cover charge, #employee appreciation day, #evil director, #harder to appreciate, #pocket money

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert: Employee Appreciation Day is next Tuesday. The cover charge is $25 apiece. wally: How do we know you won't buy cheap hot dogs and pocket the rest of our money? Catbert: Every day it gets harder to appreciate you." gulp gulp gulp

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pr campaign, #stock price, #grossly inflated, #buy companies, #make money, #manage companies

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Thanks to my P.R. campaign, your stock price is grossly over-inflated." "Now you can use your stock to buy companies that actually make money." "After you manage those companies into the toilet, give me a jingle."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #finances, #money, #obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Financial Advisor Man: You've made a lot of money as a demotivational speaker. I recommend allocating 2% of it to me, and 98% to things that sound good if you don't look into them too closely. How about a managed stock fund with high churn and a big front-end load? Wally: Sounds good.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #factory, #elbonia, #stock swap, #reached agreement, #rebels, #company value, #terrorits, #indirectly

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I reached an agreement with the rebels so they won't attack our factory in Elbonia." "It's a stock swap. Every time they collect a ransom, the value of our company will increase." The Boss: "Doesn't that make us terrorists?" Dilbert: "Very indirectly."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #benchmarks, #global warming, #normally, #pleasent week, #polluter, #problem, #solution, #too hot to work, #work indoors

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Wally, did you complete the benchmark tests?" wally: "No." slurp The Boss: "Because?" Wally: "Global warming." The Boss: "What?" Wally: "Well, normally this would have been a pleasant week." "But thanks to you and your stupid SUV, it was too hot to work." "Remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem." The Boss: "You work indoors!" Wally: "Said the polluter."