Wide Eyes Comic Strips - Page 17

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247 Results for Wide Eyes

View 161 - 170 results for wide eyes comic strips. Discover the best "Wide Eyes" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags merger talks, business as usually, happy, yell, take off shirt, take off tie, wide eyes, surprise, outburst, shirtless, bare chest, plan

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The Boss says, "We're in merger talks, but it's business as usual until it goes through." Wally says, "I'm free! My efforts won't influence my rewards!" The Boss says, "I said business as usual." Wally says, "I was totally planning to do this today."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, certification, lazy, lie, plan b, yell, passionate defense, argument, scare, wide eyes, point, shake finger, apology, business

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Wally says, "I accomplished nothing this week because I was going through certification." Wally thinks, "Don't ask. Don't ask. Don't ask." The Boss says, "Certification for? what?" Wally thinks, "Plan B: Mount a passionate defense against an argument that no one made." Wally says, "How can you say that certification is a waste of time?!" Wally says, "Without certification, management would be reduced to randomness!" Wally says, "Do you think you'd be happier just guessing who is qualified to do what? Do you? Do you?" The Boss says, "There's something wrong with you." Wally says, "Apology accepted. Next."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, presentation, slide show, names, trademarked, hand motion, crotch area, wide eyes, shocked, gross, point, war criminals, nicknames, partnerless loving, business

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Dilbert says, "This next slide shows all of the possible names for our product that are not already trademarked." The Boss says, "Are there any that don't remind people of this general area of the human body?" Dilbert says, "That narrows it down to the names of accused war criminals, and the funnier nicknames for partnerless loving."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags avoid work, lazy, love, crazy, insane, stalking, old carpet, married, wide eyes, relationships

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Carol says, "Wally, you helped me avoid work, and now I can't help loving you." Carol says, "I show my love by a combination of insanity and stalking." Wally says, "Aren't you married?" Carol says, "You owe me an old carpet."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dog, warranty plan, design, hell, hot, tongs, wide eyes, evil, insurance, animals

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The Boss says, "I hired a confusopoly consultant to help us design an extended warranty plan." Dogbert says, "Our goal is to scare people into buying insurance that doesn't cover anything." Dogbert says, "I can't tell you where the contract was designed, but be careful because it's still hot."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags powerpoint coma, trance, eyes wide, funny poses, finger up nose, police, brain, dead, legal

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Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh. My audience has fallen into a Powerpoint coma." Dilbert thinks, "The only thing I can do now is put them in funny poses and leave." Police Officer says, "It looks like his finger hit brain."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags wide eyes, merger, hope, status, upgrade, nonexistent, unimportant, job, business

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The Boss says, "The people buying our company don't know that your project exists." The Boss says, "And you're not allowed to talk to anyone over there. But don't lose hope." The Boss says, "I'm working hard to upgrade your status from nonexistent to unimportant."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new job, internal, human resources, celebrate, dance, eyes closed, mouth open, double, business

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Catbert says, "Good news, Alice. You got the internal job you posted for." Alice says, "YES!!!" Catbert says, "You'll need to keep doing your old job too." Alice says, "Did you just make me celebrate a doubling of my workload?" Catbert says, "Thank you for acknowledging my awesomeness."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags yell, pain, hurt, mouth open, eyes closed, surprise, elves, uppity, software, magic, engineering

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Alice says, "GAAA!!! II HURTS SO BAD!" Alice says, "That artificial display of pain was a reminder that software is not created by magic." The Boss says, "The Elves are getting uppity."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, employee, meeting, change, freak out, panic, mouth open, yell, eyes closed, death, business, medical

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The Boss says, "Don't be afraid of change, Asok." Asok says, "Okay. Wait. What?" Asok says, "You subtle implication is that I should change to be more like you!" The Boss says, "Bumpy start." Asok says, "I choose death!"