Desk Comic Strips - Page 17
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979 Results for Desk
View 161 - 170 results for desk comic strips. Discover the best "Desk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday July 13,
2001
Tags rumor of layoffs, nope, friday, monday, day off, boss
Transcript
Ted approaches the Boss' desk and asks, "I heard a rumor that there might be layoffs on Friday. Is it true?" The Boss shakes his head and signals with his arms. He says, "Absolutely not. No way. Nope. Negatory. No, no, no, no, no." Ted says, "Great. Can I take off Friday?" The Boss looks away guiltily and says, "Monday would be better."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday July 12,
2001
Tags donut head, face, hole, hole in head, man is brief, no face, real no brainer, resume, blank paper
Transcript
The Boss sits at his desk with a piece of paper in front of him and says, "Frankly, the job is a real no-brainer." A person with a huge hole in their head sits in front of the desk as the Boss continues, "Your resume is a blank piece of paper. I like a man who can be brief." The man with the hole in his head sits between Wally and Dilbert. Wally is eating a donut and coffee. Wally turns to the man and says, "You're ruining my donut experience."
Wednesday July 11,
2001
Tags mother could use, moron, mother fed boss, Dilbert, desk, computer, together, bug in computer, technology
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his computer as the Boss sits behind him saying, "It needs to be so easy that your mother could use it." Dilbert replies, "My mother isn't a moron. Maybe we could use your mother as the test." The Boss asks, "What makes you think my mother is a moron?" Dilbert says, "She fed you."
Sunday July 01,
2001
Tags approval, computer purchse, capital budget, ceo, apparoval, asks for things, assemble computer, cubicles, cheap boss, need approval
Transcript
Dilbert approaches the Boss' desk with a piece of paper. Dilbert says, "I need your approval for to buy a new computer." The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" as Dilbert speaks. The Boss replies, "There's a freeze on the capital budget. Only our CEO can approve it." Dilbert holds out the slip of paper again and says, "Could you ask him to..." as The Boss says, "Eh! Eh!" The Boss replies, "I don't want to be the guy who always asks for things." The Boss continues, "Maybe you could assemble a computer from components that are each within my approval limit?" Dilbert asks, "What's your approval limit?" The Boss replies, "Ten dollars." Dilbert says, "If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle banging my head against the wall." The Boss stands overlooking the cubicles from his office door as sounds of "Thud! Thud! Thud! come from a cubicle. The Boss thinks to himself, "This is why I keep them in soft-walled containers."
Friday June 29,
2001
Tags anyone offers food, dont eat, fill in receptionist, impression visitors, face of company
Transcript
The Boss comes to Carol's desk and says, "Carol, I need you to fill in for our receptionist today." The Boss continues, "Remember, you will be the face of our company, the first impression for visitors." Carol is seen at the receptionist's desk. A visitor stands at the desk looking surprised as Carol says, "If anyone offers you food, don't eat it."
Wednesday June 20,
2001
Tags 5 dollars per night, mini bar, motion detector, three hundred, charged near it, long night
Transcript
Dilbert stands at a hotel concierge desk. The desk attendant says, "The room costs five dollars a night." The attendant continues, saying, "The mini-bar has a motion detector; you will be charged three hundred dollars everytime you get within eight feet of it." The room is small and the mini-bar is in the center of the room. Dilbert crouches in the corner of his room next to his bed, thinking, "This is going to be a long night."
Tuesday June 19,
2001
Tags co pilot seat, fly 747, pilot, chiroparcter, people flying plane, commercial airline, over booked, random
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of an airline desk speaking with a flight attendant. The flight attendant says, "We overbooked. But I can give you the co-pilot's seat if you know how to fly a 747." Dilbert stands in front of a long line of people and says, "Um...Yeah, okay. I can fly a 747." Dilbert is in the cockpit of a plane with another guy. Dilbert asks, "Should I do something?" The guy replies, "Beats me. I'm a chiropractor."
Monday June 18,
2001
Tags meeting, monday morning, travel all day, stealing life, reschedule, social plans, business
Transcript
The Boss sits behind his desk and says, "I told them you would be at the meeting Monday morning." Dilbert says, "What?? That means I have to travel all day Sunday. You're stealing my life!" Dilbert sits on the couch in his robe eating. He turns to Dogbert and says, "Then he said if I had social plans he'd reschedule." Dogbert replies, "Ouch."
Thursday May 24,
2001
Tags dating, unattractive, ugly, woman fixes up, project, combover, stay out of wind, relationships
Transcript
Alice approaches Noriko who is sitting at her desk. Alice asks, "I'm dating an unattractive man. What should I do?" Noriko replies, "Every man is ugly until a woman fixes him up. Think of it as a project." Alice stands with a clipboard in hand as she lists her unattractive man's faults, who sits before her, obviously balding. She says, "Next, lose the combover, or at least stay out of the wind." The man asks, "How did you know about the combover?"
Tuesday May 22,
2001
Tags bait and switch, first and third wives, invited for drinks, men vs women, pretext, tricked, undertsand
Transcript
Alice approaches the Boss' desk and says, "A vendor invited me for drinks. It's the only time he has to talk about his product." The Boss says, "He's using the old bait-lube-and-switch trick. That's how I met my first and third wives." Alice replies, "I don't understand." The Boss says, "That's why it works."


