Nice Woman Comic Strips - Page 17

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690 Results for Nice Woman

View 161 - 170 results for nice woman comic strips. Discover the best "Nice Woman" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talking, #woman, #insane, #crazy, #dating, #weird, #relationships

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Dilbert says, "Hi. My name is?" Woman says, "Whoa! Whoa! Not in person!" Woman says, "I only meet men through online dating sites. That way I can filter out the losers." Dilbert says, "Too crazy too fast." Woman says, "I know. I'm working on that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #flirting, #dinner, #afraid, #confused, #yelling, #relationships

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Woman says, "You're not my type. Why am I attracted to you? How did you do this, you monster!" Dilbert says, "In troubling economic times, my financial stability appeals to your survival instincts. It's basic evolution." Woman says, "Gaaa!!! That made me bored and aroused at the same time!" Dilbert says, "Science!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #flirting, #yelling, #scared, #confused, #relationships

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Dilbert says, "I have an actual job and I don't live at home." Dilbert says, "My offspring would probably be smart." Woman says, "My palms are getting sweaty and my heart is pounding. What is going on?" Dilbert says, "It's a Darwinian thing." Woman says, "Make it stop!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new employee, #annoying, #frustrated, #cruel

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The boss says, "I hired a woman who laughs too much." Woman says, "Ha ha ha ha ha!" The boss says, "She'll be in the cubicle next to yours." Woman says, "Wa-ha ha ha ha!" Dilbert says, "I no longer worry about life passing too quickly."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sarcasm, #lying down, #therapy, #psychology

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Dilbert says, "I've fallen in love with my phone." Dilbert says, "It entertains me. It knows where I am. It responds to my touch. It never judges me." Psychiatrist says, "So, it's like a woman to you." Dilbert says, "Way better." Dilbert says, "Are your even listening?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #presentation, #chart, #appeased, #astonished, #stupidity

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Dilbert says, "I didn't have anything useful to say so I made this pie chart." the boss says, "Oooh!" Woman says, "Oooh!" CEO says, "It must be true because it's pie." Dilbert thinks, "That worked too well." people say, "I pledge my life and fortune to the pie!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reprimand, #ridiculous, #unwanted, #confused, #group

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A woman says, "Wally, we'd like to transition your role in this project." woman says, "During the first week, you were the lead engineer." woman says, "Going forward, you'll be in more of an advisory role." woman says, "And by that I mean we have a restraining order against you." woman says, "You're not allowed within 100 yards of the conference room." woman says, "We've changed our cell phone numbers and e-mail addresses." woman says, "And we're all having reconstructive surgery so you won't recognize us in the hallway." The boss says, "Did you accomplish anything this week?" Wally says, "Mary, is that you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job, #hatred, #advise, #business

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Dilbert works in collections Dilbert says, " how am I supposed to collect money from people who don't have any?" Woman says, "Tell them to rob someone you don't like." Dilbert says, "?and that's my supervisor's home address. But you'd better hurry before all the good stuff is gone."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interview, #sweat, #nervous, #rudeness

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Job interview Woman says, "I detect the flop sweat of desperation." Woman says, "I base my hiring decisions on who would make a good mate, and I would never want to give life to your sweaty baby." Woman says, "Do you see what I'm saying?" crumple Dilbert says, "Can I try again when I'm dehydrated?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #walking, #park, #copyright, #ownership, #humor, #Sports

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Dilbert says, "I lost an intellectual property case with my ex-employer. Now they own my name." Dilbert says, "It costs my five dollars every time I introduce myself." woman says, "I already forgot your name. What was it?" Dilbert says, "Can I tell you next month? I'm on a budget?" woman says, "Sure, if you think you can find me."