Tech Support Comic Strips - Page 17
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262 Results for Tech Support
View 161 - 170 results for tech support comic strips. Discover the best "Tech Support" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 09,
1999
Tags negative number, square root, strategic plan, timeline, mobius strip
Transcript
Dilbert stands in the boss' office. Dilbert says, "I found some numbers that support your strategic plan." Dilbert looks at a piece of paper and says, "I had to take the square root of a negative number to do it." Dilbert says, "The timeline is on the mobius strip." The boss says, "Good work."
Wednesday August 04,
1999
Tags dogberts tech support, shut up, reboot, shut up and hang up, call time, improving
Transcript
Caption: "Dogbert's tech Support" Dogbert answers the phone at his computer. The voice on the phone says, "Hello, I..." Dogbert says, "Shut up and reboot." The voice on the phone says, "Hey, it work..." Dogbert says, "Shut up and hang up.." Dogbert looks at his watch and thinks, "My average call time is improving."
Tuesday August 03,
1999
Tags tech support, queue, loser, speak to superior, religious debate, question
Transcript
A man sits in front of his computer and talks on the phone. He says, "Finally! I've been in the tech support queue for an hour!" Dogbert says, "Loser." The man says, "Can I speak to your superior?" Dogbert says, "There's some religious debate on that question."
Wednesday July 21,
1999
Tags tina tech writer, derogatory, condescending email, stomach ache, flee country
Transcript
Caption: "Tina the tech writer" Tina types at her computer and thinks, "My derogatory and condescending e-mail will set things right" Tina clicks a key and thinks, "Send!" Tina looks sick, places her hand on her stomach and thinks, "Everytime I send e-mail, I get a stomachache and an urge to flee the country."
Saturday July 03,
1999
Tags dogberts tech support, upgrade software, old software, back up data, delete it yourself
Transcript
Caption: "Dogbert's tech support" Dogbert talks on the phone at a computer. Dogbert says, "If you upgrade your software, all of your data will be lost." Dogbert says, "But if you don't upgrade, the old software will corrupt your data one bit at a time." Dogbert says, "And if you try to back up your data, our software will hunt you down and bit-slap you until you delete it yourself."
Monday May 10,
1999
Tags volume tcalls, tech support calls, on hold music, ballon rub, driving getaway car
Transcript
The boss says, "We've reduced the volume of technical support calls.." The boss says, "By replacing our "on hold" music with the sound that balloons make when you rub them." Wally says, "Do you ever feel like we're driving the getaway car?"
Wednesday April 21,
1999
Tags dogbert consults, eliminate phone support, via internet, discourage people, ominous list, personal questions
Transcript
Caption: "Dogbert Consults" Sogbert stands on the boss's desk. DOgbert says, "Eliminate phone support for your product. Provide help only via the internet." Dogbert's tail wags and he says, "Then discourage people by making them answer an ominous list of personal questions." Man looks terrified in front of his computer the computer screen reads, "1. What is your home address? 2. When do you shower?"
Friday April 16,
1999
Tags moron, designed computer, locks up, threats to tech support
Transcript
Dilmom is on the phone in front of her computer. She says, "Hello. May I speak to the moron who designed my computer?" Dilbert's mom says, "My computer locks up five times a day. I'm going to drive over to your house and kick your white, pimply..." Dilbert says, "Hi, Mom." Dilmom says, into the phone, "Oh I'll FIND it!"
Tuesday April 13,
1999
Tags secret lair, teach reality, dumpster, cubicle, french fry, lumbar support
Transcript
Phil drags Asok by his tie. Phil says, "Asok, come to my lair and I will teach you about reality." Asok and Phil stand by a dumpster. ASok says, "Your secret lair is a dumpster?" Phil says, "Get in" Asok and Phil sit in the middle of the trash in the dumpster. Asok says, "It's like my cubicle, but with much better lumbar support!" Phil eats a french fry and says, "French fry?"
Wednesday March 31,
1999
Tags dogberts tech support, hard reboot, listen carefully, rent a van, dynamite, stolen dynamite, main relay station, talk, aim bazooka, van
Transcript
Dogbert sit at a computer. Caption: "Dogbert's Tech Support" Dogbert says, on the phone "You'll need to do a hard reboot. Listen carefully." Dogbert says, "Rent a van and fill it with stolen dynamite. Park it near the power company's main relay station." Dilbert says, "Can we talk?" Dogbert wags his tail and says on the phone, "...Now aim the bazooka at the van."


