Against Rules Comic Strips - Page 17
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Character
186 Results for Against Rules
View 161 - 170 results for against rules comic strips. Discover the best "Against Rules" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 15,
2017
Resources Complain
Tags #leadership, #language, #jargon, #manager
Transcript
Man: I want to lodge a complaint against Dilbert. He called me a "resource." I find that offensive. Boss: Then he offended one of the resources. CEO: You're right. He does sound like a natural leader.
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Tuesday March 14,
2017
Can't Take Vacation
Tags #company policy, #catch-22, #rules, #exception
Transcript
Dilbert: Our policy says I can't take my vacation until I complete all of my mandatory training. I can't take the fax safety class because it no longer exists. Can you make a policy exception for me? Boss: Okay, I won't force you to take a vacation.
Monday April 03,
2017
Alice Dates Robot
Tags #dating, #human resources, #company policy, #robot, #relationships, #free will, #business
Transcript
Alice: Am I allowed to date a co-worker? Catbert: That's against company policy. Alice: Is our robot considered a co-worker? Catbert: No. Alice: We're good to go. Robot: Man, I wish I had free will.
Saturday July 08,
2017
Immersive Vr Employee Quits
Tags #virtual reality, #civil rights, #discrimination, #artificial intelligence, #rights
Transcript
Boss: Our immersive VR employee quit. He's suing the company for discriminating against digitally rendered people. Catbert: Is it too late to kill him? Boss: I tried, but he cloned himself to cloud storage.
Friday September 22,
2017
Tina The Whistleblower
Tags #company policy, #human resources, #whistleblower, #security, #confidential, #business
Transcript
Tina: Is there any kind of whistleblower protection at this company? Boss: Yes, management is protected against whistleblowers like you. Tina: Are you going to fire me? Boss: No, no, no. I'll just make you want to quit.
Tuesday September 19,
2017
Tina Has Complaints Against His Boss
Tags #human resources, #complaint, #ignore, #attention, #results, #business
Transcript
Tina: I have complaints about my boss. Many, many complaints. Catbert: Tell me about it while I pretend to listen. Tina: Then you will look into my complaints? Catbert: Is there any way you would know if I didn't?
Wednesday September 27,
2017
Everyone Says Dilbert Lied
Tags #rumor, #accusation, #conclusions
Transcript
Man: Everyone says you moved the server rack and lied about it. Dilbert: Everyone is wrong. It didn't happen. Man: Oh, so it's your word against literally "everyone?" Is that what you're saying? I'll go with the majority on this, thank you very much. Dilbert: I want to like people, but they don't make it easy.
Saturday January 20,
2018
Ceo Gives Shoulder Rubs
Tags #flirting, #implementation, #new rules, #shoulder rub, #sock collar, #team spirit
Transcript
CEO: Hey, Alice. Let me give you a shoulder rub in the name of team spirit. CEO: AAAAGH!!! Alice: click CEO: I hate having a court - ordered shock collar. The boss: I don't see a...oh.
Thursday April 05,
2018
Team Building Dance
Tags #team-building, #dance, #rules, #restrictions, #Fun
Transcript
Boss: This year's team-building event will be a dance. No alcohol will be served. The event is for employees only, and you're not allowed to touch each other. Have a great time. Dilbert: How?
Saturday April 07,
2018
Elbonian Interference With Ads
Tags #hacker, #troll, #social media, #damage, #marketing, #bot, #nonsense, #business, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert: Our competitors hired an Elbonian troll farm to ruin our brand on social media. Their most viral ad against us so far says, "How ice cream they bicycle art!" Boss: How many views did it get? Dilbert: Seven, including this one.