Calculate Expected Value Comic Strips - Page 17

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

171 Results for Calculate Expected Value

View 161 - 170 results for calculate expected value comic strips. Discover the best "Calculate Expected Value" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Makes Dilbert Get Buy In

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Makes Dilbert Get Buy In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers, #purpose, #use, #useful, #threat

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'll approve this if you get buy-in from the rest of the department. Dilbert: What value are you adding to that scenario? Boss: I'm not firing you. Dilbert: In that case, keep up the good work.

Asok Approves

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Approves - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #desperate, #desperation, #intern, #subordinate, #value, #importance

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I hear you need everyone's buy-in to proceed with your project. Dilbert: Everyone except you. No one cares what interns think. Asok: May I please approve it so I feel alive? Dilbert: Well... okay. But you owe me one.

Tina Gives Buy In

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Gives Buy In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #negotiation, #money, #price, #cost, #value

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need everyone's buy-in on my project. Tina: You can have my buy-in for $25. Dilbert: Ted only charged me $15. Tina: It isn't my fault that Ted is a bad negotiator.

Agile Methodology

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Agile Methodology - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #agile, #coding, #engineer, #method, #misunderstanding, #software, #technology, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're moving to an agile methodology for software development. I don't know all of the details, but I think one of you has to be designated the scrumbag. Does that sound right? Dilbert: It's better than I expected.

Devil's Advocate

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Devil's Advocate - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #devil's advocate, #demon, #devil, #anger, #idiom

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do you mind if I play devil's advocate on this? Dilbert: Okay. Boss: Die! Die! Die! Suffer and burn forever!!! How was that? Dilbert: Better than I expected.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #team, #teamwork, #collaboration, #excuses, #group project, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Thank you all for coming. I'm hoping we can make a lot of progress in the next hour. Alice; I didn't get any sleep last night, so don't expect much from me. Asok: I'm so hungry I can barely think. Man 1: I might be a bit distracted today because my wife told me she wants to leave me. Wally: I can't stay for the whole meeting. I have another thing in a few minutes Man 2: I'm only here to sabotage your project because I can't abide the success of others. Dilbert; Why don't all of you leave now and I'll make all the decisions myself. Boss: How'd the team meeting go? Dilbert: Better than I expected.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #employee, #calendar, #week, #awkward, #problem, #schedule, #relative, #lunch, #sandwich

View Transcript

Transcript

Male Employee: Do you have an hour to meet next week? Dilbert: Let me check my calendar. Next week is not good. Male Employee: You don't have one hour of free time all week? Dilbert: Well, this is awkward. The problem isn't my schedule so much as your total lack of value relative to my alternatives. Male Employee: Maybe we could meet over lunch? Dilbert: I like to focus on my sandwich.

Evil Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Evil Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #business ethics, #chimps, #evil, #marketing, #office, #product

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert, the boss and dogbert at conference room table. the boss: our competition released a product that makes our product look like it was designed by chimps. the boss: that's why i hired the world's most evil marketing expert to help us close the perception gap. the boss: should we focus on our value proposition? dogbert: if that means accusing them of crimes they didn't commit, then yes.

Below Average

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Below Average - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #engineering, #jobs, #math, #sarcasm, #review

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your job performance is below average. Dilbert: How did you calculate an average for a job that no one else has ever performed? Boss: Math?

Job Has No Meaning

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Job Has No Meaning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #employment, #job, #salary, #meaningful

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My job doesn't have meaning. Dogbert: If your employer added meaning to your job, would you agree to a cut in pay? Dilbert: No. Dogbert: I guess we just found the economic value of "meaning".