Mental Problems Comic Strips - Page 17

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227 Results for Mental Problems

View 161 - 170 results for mental problems comic strips. Discover the best "Mental Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 2009's comic on:


Tags #yelling, #budget, #meeting, #begging, #confused, #business

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The boss says, "Until the economy improves, we are instituting a mandatory week off every quarter." The boss says, "At least you'll have more time with your families." Ted says, Nooo!!! Not my family!!!" The boss says, "Problems at home?" Ted says, "May I please work without pay?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2009's comic on:


Tags #newspaper, #economy, #hardship, #sacrifice, #Entertainment

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Elbonian says, "The big countries are having economic problems. Experts say it will soon affect Elbonia." Elbonian says, "We'll need to cut back on some of our luxury expenses." Elbonia says, "You can stop practicing your fetching," Pig says, "Should I ask why?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 2009's comic on:


Tags #telephone, #concern, #death, #mistake, #product, #medical

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Dilbert says, "My boss just told me that he changed my drawings for the smart phone before he sent them to you for prototyping." Dilbert says, "I was wondering if you're having any problems with it?" Man says, "The camera's a bit aggressive."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 2009's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #employee, #graduate, #new, #avoiding, #useless, #business

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Man says, "I just got my MBA, and I'm here to solve all of your problems." Dilbert says, "Our products are junk and we're completely out of capital." Man says, "Have you tried jargon?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 26, 2009's comic on:


Tags #performance, #review, #meeting, #suggestion, #insult, #ridicule, #angry, #business

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Performance Review The Boss says, "You need to get better at anticipating problems." Dilbert says, "If I could anticipate problems, I wouldn't have agreed to work for you." Dilbert says ,"You seem angry, I did not see that coming."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2009's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #discussion, #news, #angry, #ridicule, #joke, #humor, #business

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The Boss says, "From now on, we will refer to all of our problems as opportunities." Carol says, "One of your idiot spawn was playing with the oven and burned down your house." Wally says, "Camping opportunity?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 25, 2009's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #problems, #solution, #misunderstanding, #ignoring, #confused, #stupidity

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Dilbert says, "You're paying contractors to do work that I could do if I weren't always in unproductive meetings." Dilbert says, "You could hire temps to attend the unproductive meetings for me, and fire the more expensive contractors." Dilbert says, "Why don't I understand what you just said?" Dilbert says, "Because it made sense?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 25, 2008's comic on:


Tags #engineers, #hauled away, #human resources, #questioning mental stability, #sealed in concrete, #wrapped in plastic, #bodies hidden, #business

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The Boss says, "Go to human resources for a psychological evaluation." Dilbert says, "Why??? Have I said anything that is abnormal?" The Boss says, "You're an engineer. Everything you say is abnormal." Catbert says, "Question one: How many bodies are hidden in the crawl space under your house?" Dilbert says, "If they are hidden, how would I know?" Catbert says, "Well, maybe you would smell them." Dilbert says, "Not if they were wrapped in heavy plastic and sealed in concrete." Wally says, "How'd it go?" Dilbert says, "Not so good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2009's comic on:


Tags #lazy, #new employee, #youth, #argument, #violence, #pain, #victory

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Wally says, "And obviously I can't do anything until our floom vendor updates the glimrods." Man says, "I'll bitspew a protopatch to your glimrod array and you can get right to work." Sometimes a young engineer challenges the dominant work-avoider in the herd. Wally says, "Oh, really?" Wally says, "Too bad the router isn't configured to handle protopatch server traffic." Man says, "I'll remotely reconfigure the router to think the protopatch server is a hexadulian data compressor." Wally says, "If you do that, you'll crash the firewall and expose everyone at this table to identity theft!" Tina says, "Stop that! I have enough problems!" Punch! Wally says, "Never go network on me, kid."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 2010's comic on:


Tags #wdnw system, #wally does no work, #meeting, #acronym, #lazy, #get coffee, #business

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Wally says, "I need to spend the next year optimizing the WDNW system" Boss says, "I've never heard of the WDNW system." Wally says, "You only hear about the systems that have problems." Wally says, "If everything goes as planned, you'll never hear about WDNW again." Boss says, "What does the WDNW system do?" Wally says, "It keeps our zeros and ones from accidentally forming tens." Boss says, "That can happen?" Wally says, "Not on my watch." Dilbert says, "How's the 'Wally Does No Work' project?" Wally says, "The acronym helped."