Terrible News Comic Strips - Page 17

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

219 Results for Terrible News

View 161 - 170 results for terrible news comic strips. Discover the best "Terrible News" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new job, #internal, #human resources, #celebrate, #dance, #eyes closed, #mouth open, #double, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says, "Good news, Alice. You got the internal job you posted for." Alice says, "YES!!!" Catbert says, "You'll need to keep doing your old job too." Alice says, "Did you just make me celebrate a doubling of my workload?" Catbert says, "Thank you for acknowledging my awesomeness."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2010's comic on:


Tags #book deal, #quotes, #stupid, #dumb, #quote fingers, #intellectual, #tweet, #twitter, #social media, #angry, #grit teeth, #nonsense, #yell, #spill coffee, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "Good news: I got a book deal based entirely on the dumb things you've said." Asok says, "It's totally legal because the law only protects 'intellectual' property." The Boss says, "Frugga bugga!!!" Asok says, "And so began the sequel."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 24, 2009's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #yelling, #angry, #future

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok the intern says, "Your generation is leaving my generation a dying planet and a crippling debt." Wally says, "Hee Hee!" Asok the intern says, "But we shall invent life-extending drugs so you will suffer along with us! Ha!" News Wally says, "Uh-oh." Asok the intern says, "We will connect you to machines and keep you alive until the poor demand to eat you." Wally says, "Well played."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 2009's comic on:


Tags #work, #project, #change, #angry, #frustrated, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I made some improvements to your drawings and sent them for fabrication." Dilbert says, "Gaaa!!!" The boss says, "But don't worry - I left your name on them so you'll get all of the credit." Dilbert says, "Waaaa!!!" The boss says, "You don't handle good news very well." Dilbert says, "Shoot me! Shoot me! Shoot me!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2009's comic on:


Tags #newspaper, #scared, #praying, #stock broker, #sitting, #computer, #reading, #smiling, #technology, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "Your stockbroker is in the news today." The boss says, "Uh-oh." The boss says, "Please be because he won a humanitarian award?or he was killed by a celebrity." Carol says, "Ironically, several celebrity humanitarians do want to kill him now." The boss says, "Gaaaa!!!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2009's comic on:


Tags #raise, #bribery, #agreement, #money, #clothes, #confused, #crime

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources Wally says, "According to the news, everyone in power is corrupt." Catbert says, "So?" Wally says, "If you give me a 20% raise, I'll kick back half to you." Catbert says, "Done." Dilbert says, "How did you afford a new vest in this economy? Crime?" Wally says, "I'm dabbling."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 2009's comic on:


Tags #angry, #pointing, #flaws, #yelling, #screaming

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "You'd actually be attractive if you didn't have crazy eyes." Woman says, "What?" Dilbert says, "The eyes are the mirror of the soul. Your soul appears to be mostly spiders and bad news." Dilbert says, "Any minute now?" Woman says, "You cause the rain!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2009's comic on:


Tags #sitting, #news, #deception, #evil

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Sales are tanking because our online reviews are awful." The boss says, "Cripple a feature and change the model number so the online reviews look stale." Dilbert says, "Wow. That was a lot of evil packed into one sentence." The boss says, "Thank you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 2009's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #discussion, #news, #angry, #ridicule, #joke, #humor, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "From now on, we will refer to all of our problems as opportunities." Carol says, "One of your idiot spawn was playing with the oven and burned down your house." Wally says, "Camping opportunity?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 13, 2009's comic on:


Tags #sitting, #reprimand, #discipline, #excuses, #explaining, #raises, #news, #budget, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Wally, when you don't give 100%, it's unfair to your co-workers who have to pick up the slack." Wally says, "Actually, I'm pretty sure they like having less competition for raises." The Boss says, "There's no budget for raises this year." Wally says, "Yeah, I wouldn't mention that to the others."