War With France Comic Strips - Page 17
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1000 Results for War With France
View 161 - 170 results for war with france comic strips. Discover the best "War With France" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday August 26,
2014
Tags #work ethic, #great team, #great results, #inexperienced intern, #useless guy, #corpse, #exoskeleton, #conflicts with plan
Transcript
Dilbert: Experts say you need a great team to get great results. We're going to prove them wrong because our team is an inexperienced intern, a useless guy, a corps in an exoskeleton and me. Wally: That conflicts with my plan to prove the experts right.
Monday January 05,
2015
Dating Is A B Testing
Tags #analysis, #comparison, #dating, #first date, #judging, #a-b testing, #click with, #analytics, #measuring, #too many questions, #relationships, #science
Transcript
Woman: Have you been dating a lot? Dilbert: I call it A-B testing. I go on dates and then compare the analytics to see who I click with most.Woman: What exactly are you measuring? Dilbert: Asks too many questions.
Monday April 20,
2015
Brainstorm With Other Engineers
Tags #product design, #managers, #marketing, #simplicity, #complication, #inventions, #ideas, #business
Transcript
Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?
Wednesday May 13,
2015
Agree With Idiots To Gain Trust
Tags #condescention, #condescending, #agreement, #mocking, #insult, #insulting
Transcript
Boss: Stop agreeing with me in ways that sound like you don't mean it. Dilbert: Experts say one should first agree with idiots to gain trust before trying to change their minds. Boss: You need to stop doing that. Dilbert: You are so right about that.
Thursday June 18,
2015
Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend
Tags #breakup, #dating, #breaking up, #drone, #stalking, #follow, #spying, #attention, #relationships
Transcript
Alice: I'm breaking up with you because you don't give me enough attention. All you care about is your stupid aerial photography hobby. I wish you the best. That felt like a clean break.
Wednesday June 24,
2015
Wally's Hobby
Tags #compliment, #insult, #backhanded compliment, #hobby, #obliviousness, #deception
Transcript
Wally: Your strategy looks like a genius way to fight the last war. Boss: Thank you. Wally: No problem. You owe me a compliment. At what point does insulting your boss and getting away with it count as a hobby?
Monday July 20,
2015
Tina Can't Compete With Smartphone
Tags #conversation, #distraction, #attention, #technology, #stimulation, #frustration, #smart phone, #cell phone, #social, #socialization, #etiquette & ethics, #social skills
Transcript
Tina: I want to go to lunch. Dilbert: I don't see how that can work. Your conversation skills can't compete with the stimulation I can get from my smartphone and my smartwatch. Tina: I would scowl at you if I could get your attention. Dilbert: Ooh!
Thursday August 13,
2015
Dilbert Regulates Mood With Stimulator
Tags #motivation, #stimulation, #priorities, #assignments, #deadline, #invention, #mood, #picnic, #social anxiety
Transcript
Dilbert: I invented a way to regulate my mood with an external brain stimulator. Boss: You're supposed to be organizing the company picnic. Dilbert: Did you serious expect me to do that without an external brain stimulator?
Tuesday September 22,
2015
Alice Should Network With Men
Tags #catch-22, #sexism, #Women, #sexist, #attraction, #success, #glass ceiling
Transcript
CEO: Alice, the best way to break the glass ceiling is to do more networking with male co-workers. Alice: Can we talk about this over lunch? CEO: Wow. You are so into me.
Wednesday September 23,
2015
Alice Networks With Ted
Tags #lunch, #gender, #Women, #business, #success, #double standard, #attraction, #networking, #mixed signals, #flirt, #misinterpretation
Transcript
Alice: Hey, Ted! Are you free for lunch today? Ted: I'm happily married! Leave me alone! Alice: Relax. I only want to network with you. Ted: Is it because I'm ugly?