Customer Service Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

306 Results for Customer Service

View 171 - 180 results for customer service comic strips. Discover the best "Customer Service" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #online customer survey, #how happy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's Tech Support: Please fill out the online customer satisfaction survey." "Um... But you haven't even tried to help me yet." "I like to base my help on how happy you expect to be."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2005's comic on:


Tags #vendor, #can't deliver parts, #promised parts, #better job, #never buy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our vendors rep says they can't deliver the parts for three months. The Boss: that just means he promised the parts to some other customer who did a better job of threatening him. Dilbert: How about if I say we'll never buy from you gain? vendor: Id say you're not exactly buying form us now.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2005's comic on:


Tags #core values, #integrity, #value, #honesty, #excellence, #inherent conflicts, #fund na dpassionate, #all of them, #hygiene

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Our core values are service, intergrity, respect, teamwork, responsibility, trust, diversity, value, honesty, fun, passion, fairness and excellence." wally: "How should we deal with the inherent conflicts? I mean, what if I want to be irresponsible in a fun and passionate way?" The Boss: "You have to do all of them." "I notice that hygiene didn't make the list.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 12, 2005's comic on:


Tags #phishing, #new hobby, #fake banking emails, #gullible executives, #financial information, #steal, #password social security card

View Transcript

Transcript

"I have a new hobby. It's called phishing." "I send fake banking e-mails to gullible executives. Then I find out their financial information and use it to steal the money they don't deserve." Dear Customer, This is your bank. We forgot your social security number and password. Why don't you send them to us so we can protect your money. Sincerely, I. B. Banker "Looks legit."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2005's comic on:


Tags #topper vs. a customer, #dogsled race, #world toughest terrain, #better than, #top you, #cancel deal, #burn to ground, #go one better, #more better

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper vs. a Customer "I competed in the Iditarod, an 1,150-mile dogsled race lasting 15 days, over the world's toughest terrain." "That's nothing. I completed the race while pretending to be one of your dogs." "Now I don't want to buy from your company." "That's nothing. Now I plan to burn my company to the ground!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #dance club, #allow anyone, #screen potential customers, #dance moves, #incorporated air guitar

View Transcript

Transcript

I opened a dance club that's so exclusive I don't allow anyone in. "I personally screen every potential customer until I find a reason to exclude." "Have your dance moves ever incorporated the air guitar?" "Yes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #scarf retrun, #salesman, #computer, #1000 returns, #compulsive, #company policy, #harvest organs, #sell ebay, #dilmom, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

"I'd like to return this scarf." "What's wrong with it?" "It isn't um...scarfy enough." "I'll just run your card through the computer and..." "Uh-oh...You're on our Bad Customer list. You've returned over a thousand items to this store." "In fact, you've purchased and returned this same scarf seventeen times." "Company policy says that I have to harvest your organs and sell them on eBay." "It was good while it lasted."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2005's comic on:


Tags #web service satndards, #consortium, #approval review, #executive board, #review borad

View Transcript

Transcript

"We should join the industry consortium that's promoting web services standards." "Run that past the consortium approval review board and get a sign-off from the executive board of review board reviewers." "Do those exist?" "In a perfect world, yes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2006's comic on:


Tags #customer service, #deception, #laziness, #tech support, #trick, #passowrd, #before lunch, #required

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hello, I need some tech support." "What's your tech support password?" "I don't have one." "Well, then I can't help you." "Since when do you require a password?" "Usually right before lunch."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2006's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

I invented a search engine that's also a singles matching service. "It automatically matches singles who search for the same keywords." "And then it threatens to e-mail those keywords to their mothers if they don't agree to date." "I have taught you well."