Health Insurance Comic Strips - Page 18

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224 Results for Health Insurance

View 171 - 180 results for health insurance comic strips. Discover the best "Health Insurance" comics from Dilbert.com.

Pill For Boss Conversations

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Pill For Boss Conversations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mental health, mental illness, crazy, managers, sanity, insane

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Boss: Catbert thinks I'm causing mental problems in my employees. That's crazy, right? Carol: Hold that thought. My doctor prescribed pills for when I have to talk to you.

Boss Is Sane

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Boss Is Sane - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mental health, mental illness, managers, sane, insanity, logic

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Narrator: Dogbert The Mental Health Expert. Boss: Can you confirm that my employees have lost their minds? Dogbert: Yes, because they work for you. Any other questions? Boss: But I'm sane, right? Dogbert: Yes, because you hired me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insurance, humiliation, death, scam, darwin awards, spin, headline, media, Entertainment, medical

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Dogbert: Would you like to buy an insurance policy to protect against a humorous death? Boss: Why would I need it? Dogbert: well, let's say you're at the zoo and you drop your sunglasses into the lion pit. You lower yourself into the pit to get the sunglasses, but the lions get to you first. You don't want the headlines to read "Pointy-haired Idiot Mauled To Death By The King Of The Jungle." So instead, the moment you die, my agents rush in to create a narrative for the media. In this case, we might spin the story as "Local Man Teaches Zoo How To Reduce Food Costs." Boss: Are the policies affordable? Dogbert: Yes, if you waive the coverage for mascot-related deaths.

Bossercize

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Bossercize - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, personal trainer, fitness, bossercise, criticism, managers, health

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Narrator: Dogbert The Personal Trainer. Dogbert: I invented a fitness routine I call Bossercise. It mostly involves strutting around the office and criticizing people. Boss: You incompetent fool! Dogbert: Give me twenty more reps.

Spittle

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Spittle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, fitness, fad, bossercise, yelling, criticism, managers, health

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Boss: If you need me, I'll be Bossercizing. Carol: What? Boss: It's a combination of walking around and spittle-yelling at underperformers. Carol: Is the spittle part necessary? Boss: Thhtop queth-tioning me!!!

Smartphone Syndrome

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Smartphone Syndrome - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cell phone, smart phone, compulsion, addiction, attention, distraction, mental health, technology

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Doctor: You've got a bad case of smartphone syndrome. One of hundred percent of your mental and physical problems are caused by using your phone too much. I don't feel as if I'm getting through to you. Alice texting: She's still talking. LOL.

Dogbert Sells Life Advice

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Dogbert Sells Life Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, motivation, meaning, existentialism

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Asok: How do I find meaning in my life? Dogbert: Nothing has meaning. The best you can do is postpone your own lonely and painful death. Asok: Are you saying I should take care of my health? Dogbert: What answer gets me the best review on Yelp?!

Cake Is Healthy

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Cake Is Healthy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cake, diet, employees, employment, health, health food, office, office workers

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Boss: We're launching a health and wellness initiative for employees this week. In other news, we have cake in the break room to celebrate all of the birthdays this month. Dilbert: Because cake is healthy? Boss: Learn to compartmentalize.

Take The Stairs

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Take The Stairs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags birthdays, encouragement, exercise & fitness, health, office, office workers, company, life insurance

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Boss: The company encourages you to take the stairs instead of the elevator because it is good for your health. Ted: I take the elevator because my life insurance doesn't pay off if I kill myself all at once. Boss: On another topic, we will celebrate birthdays this month with cake in the break room. Ted: Perfect.

Health Problems

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Health Problems  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags age, complaining, health, office, office workers

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Alice: Do me a favor and never put me on a project with people over the age of forty. They waste the first fifteen minutes of every meeting talking about their health problems. Boss: Did you say something? I can't hear you over my tinnitus.