Problems Comic Strips - Page 18
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Character
194 Results for Problems
View 171 - 180 results for problems comic strips. Discover the best "Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday August 08,
2018
Comparing Things
Saturday September 08,
2018
Wally Covers For Alice
Tags alice, heat, thousand suns, vacation, Wally
Transcript
Alice: I'm back from vacation. Did you have any problems covering for me? Wally: No problem at all I saved all of your work for when you got back. Alice: I hate you with the heat of a thousand suns! Wally: How was your vacation? Was it relaxing?
Thursday October 11,
2018
Anticipate Problems
Tags Wally, anticipate, finishing, friday, punctual, anticipating, things, problems
Transcript
Man: Do you anticipate any problems finishing by Friday? Wally: I do not. Man: Is that because you're punctual or because you aren't good at anticipating things? Wally: I don't foresee any unforeseen problems. Man: Okay. Wait...
Monday October 15,
2018
Everyone Else Is Worthless
Tags Dilbert, fire, pawn, problems, project, the boss, useless, work
Transcript
The Boss: I'm adding you to the network upgrade project. Everyone else on the team is lazy and useless, so I need you to do all of their work. Dilbert: Maybe you should fire them. The Boss: Don't try to pawn off your problems on me.
Monday February 18,
2019
Health Problems
Tags age, complaining, health, office, office workers
Transcript
Alice: Do me a favor and never put me on a project with people over the age of forty. They waste the first fifteen minutes of every meeting talking about their health problems. Boss: Did you say something? I can't hear you over my tinnitus.
Friday July 12,
2019
Unforseen Risks
Tags blame, boss, office, office workers, sarcasm, risks
Transcript
Boss: How can you be sure there are no unforeseen risks with this plan? Dilbert: It is not possible to know if one has considered every risk. Therefore, we can never be sure. Boss: So...I can still blame you for any problems that pop up? Dilbert: Yes, that part of the process is still intact.
Wednesday July 31,
2019
Toxic Employee And Tina
Wednesday September 25,
2019
Curse Of Competence
Tags computer software, employees, office workers, problem, sarcasm, condescending
Transcript
Man: I need your help solving a software problem on my computer. Dilbert: Why am I cursed with the sort of competence that makes me a servant to the incapable? Man: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: If you did, you could probably fix your own problems.
Monday October 07,
2019
Solves Too Few Problems
Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, proposal, problems, quitter
Transcript
boss: your proposed solution is dumb because it doesn't solve all of our problems. dilbert: there's no such thing as a solution that solves all our problems. maybe we should solve the ones we can solve? boss: you're coming off as a quitter
Sunday November 10,
2019
What If You Are In A Coma
Tags business, cell phone, client, stupid, liar, insult, understand, die, coma
Transcript
phone conversation dilbert: if you have any problems with the software, just give me a call. client: what if you die or you're in a coma? dilbert: well, in those cases i would not return your call. client: so you're lying about getting back to me. dilbert: no, i'm making a normal kind of generalization, which i assumed you would understand. client: okay, so now you're calling me stupid, and you're a liar? dilbert: if a liar calls you stupid, wouldn't that mean you are smart? client: fair point dilbert: thanks, i'm proud of it.

