Technical Issue Comic Strips - Page 18
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176 Results for Technical Issue
View 171 - 176 results for technical issue comic strips. Discover the best "Technical Issue" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday December 17,
2019
Technical Difficulties
Tags #technical, #difficulties, #meeting, #business, #conference, #call, #audio, #technology
Transcript
boss: how'd your meeting go? dilbert: we spent an hour trying to get the conference call audio to work. boss: and then? dilbert: it was a one-hour meeting.
Saturday December 21,
2019
Thwarting Alice's Career
Tags #managers & supervisors, #mentor, #deny, #Promotion, #compete, #thwart, #career, #business
Transcript
alice: can you mentor me? boss: heck, no. you're only one promotion away from competing for my job. alice: well, maybe you could just stop thwarting my career? boss: no, same issue.
Sunday February 23,
2020
Reading Faces
Tags #business, #meeting, #corrupt, #communists, #technology, #proposal, #reading faces
Transcript
co-worker: i can't support this project because you're all a bunch of corrupt, godless communists. dilbert: just out of curiosity, where did you get your education? co-worker: i learned everything i need to know on social media. dilbert: how does that help you evaluate a technical proposal? co-worker: it's simple. i take one look at all of your faces, and i know everything i need to know. co-worker looking at wally: i mean, look at this guy's face. he's obviously a grifter. wally: lucky guess. co-worker looking at alice: this one obviously has anger issues. dilbert: i demand a larger sample size! co-worker: whatever geek face.
Tuesday March 17,
2020
Hiring Morons
Tags #managers & supervisors, #technology, #business, #technical, #job, #market, #hire, #moron, #critical
Transcript
boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.
Sunday April 05,
2020
No Time Before Next Meeting
Tags #boss, #business, #care, #co-workers, #hate, #job, #lesson, #meeting, #nonesence, #procrastinate, #reality, #report, #stupid, #technical, #technology, #time
Transcript
dilbert thinking: that meeting ran long, so now i have ten minutes before the next one. i'm suppose to bring a complete technical report, and i haven't even started it. i hate this stupid job! dilbert still thinking but showing signs of distress: i hate my boss! i hate my stupid co-workers! dilbert yelling: i don't care about anything anymore! dilbert thinking and typing on laptop: i'll just angrily slap together a bunch of nonsense and call it good. grrrrrr!!! in conference room. boss: this is your bet report ever. dilbert yelling: what? dilbert at home with dogbert: today i learned a dangerous lesson about reality.
Friday May 08,
2020
Version 2 Kills
Tags #business, #upgrade, #software, #technology, #version, #health, #issue, #nonsense
Transcript
wally with face mask giving presentation: according to our newest data, 100% of the people who upgraded to version 2.0 of our software died the same day. wally to boss: but we don't think it means anything because all of them had underlying health issues. boss: how did they all have underlying health issues? wally: version 1.0 had some rough edges too.