Technical Jargon Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

182 Results for Technical Jargon

View 171 - 180 results for technical jargon comic strips. Discover the best "Technical Jargon" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticism, #jargon, #misunderstanding, #genius, #obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your slide deck is okay-ish. But can you make it more aspirational? Dilbert: It's just a software upgrade. Boss: Yes, yes. But I want the audience to feel it. Dilbert: They can feel the handouts. Boss: It's like you're not even trying to understand! Genius is often misunderstood. Dilbert: Do you know what else is misunderstood? Boss: Super-genius?

Can't Remember Wally's Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Can't Remember Wally's Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #language, #jargon, #obliviousness, #bluff, #managers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can't remember what project you're working on. Wally: I'm integrating parallel platforms for load balancing across incremental networks. Boss: Keep doing that. I can never tell when I'm having a good day.

Jargon

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.

Alice Writes Own Review

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Writes Own Review - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #performance, #sarcasm, #review

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm asking everyone to write their own performance reviews. Alice: "She shone like the light of a thousand suns." Boss: Slop some jargon on that and put a bow on it. Alice: Got it.

Jargon Poisoning

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon Poisoning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #huddle, #jargon, #calendar

View Transcript

Transcript

ted: let's plan a huddle to ideate around that opportunity. dilbert visually distressed and yelling: gaaa!!! i have jargon poisoning! ted: i'll send you a calendar invite. dilbert has fell over and feet are in air.

Jargon Cancelling Headphones

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon Cancelling Headphones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #doctor, #doctors' offices, #office, #office workers, #prescription, #headphones, #jargon

View Transcript

Transcript

doctor: looks like you have a bad case of jargon poisoning. doctor: i'll write you a prescription for jargon-canceling headphones. they translate jargon words to normal words. office worker: let's stay in our swim lane while the tiger teams get buy-in on the verticals. dilbert hears this with headphones: nothing, nothing, nothing.

Reporting On Tina

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Reporting On Tina - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #technical, #new, #bored, #coma, #writer

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: tina is in some sort of technical writer's trance. dilbert: apparently, i took too long to explain some new technology, and it bored her into a coma. should i report this? wally: only if you can do it succinctly

Technical Difficulties

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Technical Difficulties - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technical, #difficulties, #meeting, #business, #conference, #call, #audio, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how'd your meeting go? dilbert: we spent an hour trying to get the conference call audio to work. boss: and then? dilbert: it was a one-hour meeting.

Reading Faces

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Reading Faces - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #meeting, #corrupt, #communists, #technology, #proposal, #reading faces

View Transcript

Transcript

co-worker: i can't support this project because you're all a bunch of corrupt, godless communists. dilbert: just out of curiosity, where did you get your education? co-worker: i learned everything i need to know on social media. dilbert: how does that help you evaluate a technical proposal? co-worker: it's simple. i take one look at all of your faces, and i know everything i need to know. co-worker looking at wally: i mean, look at this guy's face. he's obviously a grifter. wally: lucky guess. co-worker looking at alice: this one obviously has anger issues. dilbert: i demand a larger sample size! co-worker: whatever geek face.

Hiring Morons

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hiring Morons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #technology, #business, #technical, #job, #market, #hire, #moron, #critical

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.