Wally Clipping Nails Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Wally Clipping Nails

View 171 - 180 results for wally clipping nails comic strips. Discover the best "Wally Clipping Nails" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #imagine, #being a woman, #men in training, #people acknowledge, #can't find keys, #blouse falls off, #distorted view, #misogyny

View Transcript

Transcript

"In this sensitivity excercise, close your eyes and imagine how it feels to be a woman." "People acknowledge my existence. They smile for no reason and hold hte door open. I'm ...I'm popular." "I can't find my keys." "I'm never going back. I can't. I won't." "My blouse falls to the floor..." "Break! Break!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineer, #shut down factory, #ethical, #make film, #empowered, #more women in management, #down for day, #ego booster, #endangered bird, #parking lot, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

"From now on, any engineer can shut down our factory for any reason." "Later we'll film a commercial about how ethical and empowered you are." "Ha! Give me a raise, Tubby, or the factory's going down!" "You can't shut it down, I'm shutting it down until more women are in top management." "I'd like to shut it down for a day, just as an ego booster. Is Tuesday good?" "Didn't any of you hear that there's an endangered bird living in the parking lot??" "I think I parked on it this morning." "Can we get back to the point?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no work, #invented code, #accounting systems, #mid 80s, #undocumented spaghetti logic, #holy grail, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I've never seen you do any real work around here, Irv. How do you get away with it?" IRV: "I wrote the code for our accounting system back in the mid-eighties. It's a million lines of undocumented spaghetti logic." DILBERT: "It's the Holy Grail of technology!!" IRV: "You boys may find a little extra in your envelopes this month."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad schdeuling, #careless, #company cares, #last tuesday, #long hours, #missed out, #stress on workers, #stress redcution expert, #stressful, #talk at lunch, #too late

View Transcript

Transcript

"The company cares deeply about the effects of long hours and stress on workers." "So they're paying nearly $200 to have an expert on stress-reduction give a talk during lunch." "Just when you think they don't care, something like this comes along." "It's scheduled for lst Tuesday."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #most talented, #technical professional, #Dogbert, #professional head hunter

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hello, this is Dogbert's professional headhunting service." "I find jobs for the most talented technical professionals. Several people mentioned your name." "So, is it true they'll be looking for somebody to fill your job soon? Hello?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lab supplies, #batteries, #electric motor, #wheels, #hand truck, #build go cart, #lab, #building liner accelrator

View Transcript

Transcript

"The new lab supplies are in!" "We got the batteries, and the electric motor!" "Take the wheels off the hand truck and we can start building our go-cart." "I think I'll drop in on the lab." "What are you working on now?" "We're building a linear accelerator." "Marketing insisted." "Good, good. Carry on." "We really don't appreciate him enough." "Let's put a TV in this baby."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #benefits dept, #retire now, #haitian penny stocks, #change in tone, #letter about pension, #contrarain investor

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: Uh-oh...it's never good when we get mail from the benefits department. "retire now or we'll invest your entire pension in haitian penny stocks. Dilbert: Have you noticed a change in tone lately? Wally: Little do they know Im a contrarian investor.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #share accomplishements, #meeting, #share, #tiger team, #lock up session, #meeting cancelled, #nothing tangible, #busy work, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Let's each share our accomplishments for the month. Dilbert: To the untrained observer it might seem like I didn't accomplish anything. However, I did strategically "position" my project by socializing it within the company. Dilbert: Then Wally and I help a "tiger team" lock up session. Then I prepared the executive briefing package for the big meeting that got cancelled. Since then Ive spent most if my time looking for the best project management software to use. And I did it all within ten percent of my budget goal, Dilbert: Looking good. Wally: wow all I did was that tiger thing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carpal tunnel, #surgery, #carpool, #room in carpool, #permanent damges, #wear braces, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

"I hear you need a carpool urgently." "No, I need 'carpal tunnel surgery'." "The repetitive motion of typing has caused permanent damage. I have to wear braces until the surgery." "There's no room in my carpool."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dimly lit cucbicle, #carpal tunnel, #crippled, #last job, #coal miner, #gas explosion, #new cubcile, #canary

View Transcript

Transcript

"I guess it's time to go back to my dimly lit cubicle and see if my carpal tunnel has crippled me yet." "This is a lot like my last job as a coal miner, but without the threat of a gas explosion." "I'm moving you to a new cubicle over by Wally." "Better get a canary."