Time Travel Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Time Travel

View 171 - 180 results for time travel comic strips. Discover the best "Time Travel" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, meeting, tardiness, punctual, badmouth, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: It seems that everyone but Ted made it to this meeting. If we proceed without Ted, our decisions will be underinformed. If we try to reschedule a meeting with all of us, we will miss the critical deadline. Thanks to Ted, we have two ways to lose and no way to win. I say we use this time to say bad things about Ted to make ourselves feel better. I'll start. Ted is a lazy, selfish loser, If I could travel through time, I would prevent Ted's parents from meeting. Don't look at me like I'm the one who came late.

Bribing Wally

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bribing Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bribe, morals, laziness, work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I don't have time to help. Coworker: What if I bribe you to do your job? I am literally offering to give you my personal money to do the job your employer pays you to do. Wally: Are you willing to turn a blind eye to my total lack of effort, or should I find a better briber?

Meet At My Office

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meet At My Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meeting, schedule, time, wasting time, selfish, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Computer: Let's meet at my office on Friday. Dilbert: Sure. Or... you could waste your day traveling to my office instead. Computer: You're being a jerk. Dilbert: You started it.

Travelling Broadens Worldview

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Travelling Broadens Worldview - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags travel, perspective, view, worldview

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I love travelling because it broadens my understanding of the world. Wally: I know what you mean. I just got a cubicle near the window and now I see the world as an alleyway between me and the parking garage. Alice: That's dumb. Wally: That's not what the alley people say.

Accused Of Forgery

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Accused Of Forgery - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags motivation, performance, forgery, pessimism, giving up, resistance

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: You stand accused of forging an expense approval from the head of Marketing. Your malfeasance caused the project to finish on time and under budget. Next time, just give up and lose hope like everyone else. Dilbert: Will do.

Electric Car Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Electric Car Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manager, labor, time, time management, obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Welcome to the first meeting of our project to design an electric car. We've never tried to build an electric car, but how hard could it be? Dilbert: It's very hard. Boss: It doesn't feel that way. My part is mostly talk.

Why Didn't You Tell Me Sooner

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Why Didn't You Tell Me Sooner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags paradox, debate, arguing

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Why didn't you tell me about this sooner? Dilbert: That's a fool's game because Zeno's Paradox says there will always be a time sooner than the one I pick. Alice's Paradox says that no matter how many criticisms you explain away, there are always plenty more.

Tell Me What Was In The Email

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tell Me What Was In The Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags email, laziness, attention, detail, tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I don't have time to read your long email. Tell me what it said. Dilbert: I wrote a long email because a summary would be dangerously misleading. Boss: I'll be the judge of that. Dilbert: How?!!!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags financial, jargon, money, accounting, language

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I think it is important for every employee to understand our company's income statement. I don't have time to get into all of the details, so I'll hit the high points. Compared to last year... our ebida have been amortized over an accrued market discount. Meanwhile, our capital account liabilities have a pass-through income that is far larger than our on-time costs. And the mome raths outgrabe. Too far? Dilbert: I wasn't listening.

Asok Learns To Rank Priorities

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Learns To Rank Priorities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags priorities, Advice, hate, misanthrope, misanthropy, organization

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I'm overworked because I don't know how to set priorities. Alice: Try ranking your tasks by how much you hate the people who asked for your help. Asok: What if I don't hate anyone? Alice: That problem solves itself over time.