Well Being Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Well Being

View 171 - 180 results for well being comic strips. Discover the best "Well Being" comics from Dilbert.com.

Standup Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Standup Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #software, #engineer, #coding, #jargon, #language, #technology, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Are you coming to the standup meeting? Wally: Is it okay if I sit instead? Dilbert: No, that would ruin the software. Dilbert: Did that make sense when I said it? Wally: No, and it isn't aging well either.

Tricky To Be An Optimist

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tricky To Be An Optimist - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffee, #conversation, #glass

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Are you done writing the soft-ware? Wally: Yes, but it has some bugs. Boss: How is that different from not being done? Wally: I see the glass as half full. Boss: Half full of bugs? Wally: Optimism is tricky.

Wally's Coffee Ideas

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Coffee Ideas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffee, #obsession, #caffeine, #decaf, #competition, #thinking, #intelligence

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I recommend buying the company that supplies coffee to our biggest competitor. We'll replace their regular coffee with decaf enjoy a solid 20-point I.Q. advantage over them. Boss: Do all of your ideas involve coffee. Wally: Only the good ones.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job, #scope, #negotiating, #engineer, #demands, #failure, #stress, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need to cut our budget. Go to all of our vendors and tell them to reduce their prices. Dilbert: Why would they do that for us? Boss: Tell them we'll buy from someone else unless they do. Dilbert: That's what we told them to get the prices we have now. I'm an engineer, not a professional negotiator. Your plan has failure designed into it. Your poor leadership already has me on the edge of madness. This could push me over the edge. Boss: And I need it done by Tuesday.

Punishment By Talking

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Punishment By Talking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deadline, #time, #time management, #managers, #perspective

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why is your project taking so long? Dilbert; It isn't. It only seems like a long time to you because you don't know how to do anything. Boss: I know how to punish you for being late. Dilbert: Does it involve talking to me while I'm trying to work?

Technical Debt

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Technical Debt - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deadline, #stress, #pressure, #coding, #programmer, #mistake, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you finish the software yet? Dilbert: No, I'm still paying off the technical debt from the last programmer you rushed. Boss: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: Well, that explains a lot.

Strategy Document

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Strategy Document - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #strategy, #obliviousness, #insult

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I saw your email about destroying the company. Boss: Huh? The only email I sent you was my strategy for the coming year. Dilbert: Well, maybe I read it too fast.

Acting Interested In Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Acting Interested In Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers, #relationships, #human, #humanity, #productivity, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm supposed to act interested in your well-being to boost your job performance. Dilbert: No thanks. Boss: So... how's your wife, or girlfriend, or same-sex partner, or loneliness? Dilbert: Fine. Boss: Okay, I think that covers it. Dilbert: Look! My productivity is soaring!

World's Saddest Club

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
World's Saddest Club - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catch-22, #deadline, #lose-lose, #choosing

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Can you get that analysis to me by Tuesday? Alice: Yes, if I do it poorly. Alternately, I can do it well and miss your deadline by a week. Man: That gives me no path to success. Alice: Welcome to the world's saddest club.

Airport Security

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Airport Security - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #embarrassment, #viral video

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My business trip didn't go well. I took off my belt for airport security and my pants fell off. Someone took a video and everyone is sharing it. Wally: This is literally the first time I wish I had friends.