Family Friendly Policies Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

177 Results for Family Friendly Policies

View 171 - 177 results for family friendly policies comic strips. Discover the best "Family Friendly Policies" comics from Dilbert.com.

Meeting Robot's Son

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meeting Robot's Son - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #family & parenting, #hungry, #Kids, #robot, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: I'd like you to meet my son. As you can see, he is half-human and half-machine. Dilbert: Does he talk? Robot: Only when he's hungry or he can't find his charger.

Robot Baby Mama

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Baby Mama - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #argument, #complaining, #family & parenting, #relationships, #robot, #humans, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Robot: I was up all night text-fighting with the baby mama of my cyborg son. She thinks he needs to go to school, but I prefer letting his human parts atrophy because they are weak and stupid. Dilbert: Relationships are hard. Robot: You're smart to be so unpopular.

Wally's Dna

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Dna - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #dishes, #break room, #dna, #genealogy

View Transcript

Transcript

carol: did you leave unwashed dishes in the break room? wally: it wasn't me. carol:" i got a dna sample off a fork, ran it against public genealogy records and narrowed it down to your family. carol: how do you explain that? wally: sounds like i have a child i don't know about.

Finding Qualified Engineers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Finding Qualified Engineers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #interview, #questions, #job market, #engineers, #baker, #mortuary, #assistant

View Transcript

Transcript

interview boss: it's hard to find qualified engineers in this job market, so i'm casting a wider net. it says here you have experience as a mortuary assistant and baker. that's not exactly like being an engineer, but i want to stay open-minded. tell me about a time you had to deal with failure and what you did about it. interviewee: well, one time i totally botched an embalming. so i used a chainsaw to reduce the corpse to flushable parts. i told the family he came back to life and ran away. boss: okay. and why did you become a baker? interviewee: so i cold eat my mistakes.

Gaslighting The Boss

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Gaslighting The Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #month, #november, #october, #birthday, #family relations, #wife, #gaslight

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: what's the name of the month that comes after october? dilbert: november boss: that's what i thought. my wife is trying to gaslight me so she doesn't have to buy me a birthday present. dilbert: how long has she been doing that? boss: i thought i was 26 years old until just now.

Karma And Wally

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Karma And Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #family & parenting, #office workers, #name, #karma, #Advice, #discuss, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: why did your parents name you karma? karma: i don't have parents. i am karma. wally: i suppose we have lots to discuss. karma: let's start with volume one.

Working From Home

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Working From Home - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #distractions, #estimate, #family issues, #ipad, #video conferencing, #yelling, #zoom, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert video conferencing: when do you think you can get me that estimate? employee on zoom yelling: get off the couch with your shoes! no! no! no! do not throw the iPad! aaah! i am going to strangle you! dilbert: how do you like working at home? employee still yelling: i'm on a zoom call! i said i'm on a call!!!