Imprint On Window Screen Comic Strips - Page 18

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183 Results for Imprint On Window Screen

View 171 - 180 results for imprint on window screen comic strips. Discover the best "Imprint On Window Screen" comics from Dilbert.com.

No Progress On Writing The Novel

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No Progress On Writing The Novel - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 11, 2015's comic on:

Tags #writing, #writer, #talent, #frustration, #writers block, #self esteem, #self deprecation, #depression, #psychology

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Dogbert: How's your novel coming along? Dilbert: I'm off to a slow start. All I did this week is stare at a blank screen and feel bad about my lack of talent. Dogbert: Maybe try writing something. Dilbert: I have to think that would make things worse.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 2015's comic on:

Tags #computer, #robot, #replacement, #doctor, #medicine, #obsolete, #job, #diagnose, #necessity, #technology, #invention, #business, #medical

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Doctor: IBM's Watson supercomputer has diagnosed your symptoms. The computer just ordered the meds you need. They will be delivered in an hour by drone. Dilbert: Looks like your job as a doctor is becoming obsolete. Doctor: Ha ha! No. You still need a doctor and a nurse to make the system work. For example, the computer can't read its own screen and speak those words to patients. Dilbert: Actually, it can. Doctor: But the computer doesn't have a nurse. Dilbert: What does the nurse do? Nurse: I stab him if he tries to do more than read the screen.

Employee Hat With Sensors

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Employee Hat With Sensors - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 08, 2016's comic on:

Tags #mind control, #thoughts, #police, #policing, #work ethic, #leisure, #daydreaming, #control, #surveillance, #legal

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Boss: The sensors in your employee hat tell me you are not having work-related thoughts. I have to dock your pay for all of that leisure time you try to sneak into your workday. Here's a screen shot of what you've been thinking. Dilbert: I'm going to remember this as a bad day.

New Company Mascot

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New Company Mascot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2016's comic on:

Tags #hunchback, #posture, #transformation, #health, #body

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Catbert: I hear you're undergoing an identity transition. Dilbert: No, I just have bad posture from looking at a screen all day. I'm not literally turning into Quasimodo. Catbert: That's too bad, because we need a new mascot for the company and you would be perfect.

Hire Agile Programmers

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Hire Agile Programmers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 19, 2016's comic on:

Tags #pun, #deception, #earthquake, #agility

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Wally: You should move the agile programmers to building six because it has poor earthquake protection. they can jump out of the way if stuff starts falling. Boss; I guess that makes sense. Wally: Can I have one of their cubicles near a window?

Dilbert Characters

Travelling Broadens Worldview

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Travelling Broadens Worldview - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 23, 2016's comic on:

Tags #travel, #perspective, #view, #worldview

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Alice: I love travelling because it broadens my understanding of the world. Wally: I know what you mean. I just got a cubicle near the window and now I see the world as an alleyway between me and the parking garage. Alice: That's dumb. Wally: That's not what the alley people say.

Boss Tweets Fake News

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Boss Tweets Fake News - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2017's comic on:

Tags #conversation, #mobile (cell) phones, #talk, #window

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The department of education asked us to talk to you about all of your tweeting. You tweeted so much fake news that the average I.Q. in the country plunged seven points. That doesn't hurt anyone. You tweeted "seat belts are designed to strangle survivors so they won't sue."

Scientists Confirm We Are Simulations

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Scientists Confirm We Are Simulations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2017's comic on:

Tags #reality, #simulation, #aliens, #alternate universe, #perception

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News: Scientists confirmed that our reality is actually a software simulation created by an advanced civilization. Dilbert: That makes no sense unless the advanced civilization is a bunch of psychopaths who like to see us suffer. Catbert1: One of the idiots in our simulation is insulting us. Catbert2: I'm going to break his phone screen.

Asok's Phone Case

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Asok's Phone Case - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2017's comic on:

Tags #cell phone, #aesthetics, #impractical, #practicality, #break, #screen, #technology

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Asok: I kept dropping my phone and breaking it, so now I keep it wrapped in a big ball of cotton. Wally: Why would you buy a phone that breaks so easily? Asok: I like the way it looks.

Insurance For Phones

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Insurance For Phones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2017's comic on:

Tags #cell phone, #technology, #insurance, #break, #screen, #cracked

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Dilbert: The company that insures our mobile phone product is angry because 100 percent of our phones break in the first minute. They say it's a disaster and it is putting them out of business. What should I tell them? Boss: Tell them they should have gotten some sort of insurance.