Laziness Comic Strips - Page 18
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Character
182 Results for Laziness
View 171 - 180 results for laziness comic strips. Discover the best "Laziness" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday February 06,
2018
Wally Pivots
Tags work ethic, laziness, deception, projects
Transcript
Wally: My project was failing, so I pivoted to a different idea with the same name. Later, I'll change the project name to cover my tracks. Asok: What about your sunk costs? Wally: Gone like footprints in the sands of time.
Thursday March 01,
2018
Optimal Meeting Density
Tags laziness, excuses, excuse, meeting, meetings, powerpoint, business
Transcript
Wally: We've achieved optimal meeting density. We have so many meetings that I can avoid all of them by saying I have another meeting at the same time. Man: While you're here, can you review my slide deck? Wally: I'd love to, but I have fifty slide decks ahead of you.
Sunday April 29,
2018
Tags valor, awards, bragging, laziness
Transcript
Boss: The employee award for valor goes to Wally. During the false alarm, we noticed Wally was not with the other evacuees. He stayed behind to make sure everyone else got out. At least that's what he told us later. Wally, do you have any words of inspiration for the group? Wally: Most of you are cowards. But imagine how good you would feel winning a non-monetary award for valor. Now I ask all of you to think about how you can repay me for my selfless valor on your behalf. Dilbert: Did you sleep through the fire alarm? Wally: Most productive nap I've ever had.
Saturday March 31,
2018
Anyone Fired Lately
Thursday March 29,
2018
Doing Nothing
Tags laziness, work ethic, logic
Transcript
Boss: Wally, do you remember that thing I asked you to do last month? Wally: No. Boss: Well, that's okay because something changed and I don't need it anymore. Wally: You're welcome. You'd be surprised how often doing nothing is as good as doing something.
Wednesday April 25,
2018
Brains In A River
Tags cryogenics, ethics, laziness, yelp, online review, comments, feedback, customers
Transcript
Dogbert: Being the owner of a cryogenic investment firm is a lot of work. So instead of keeping my customers' brains frozen, I decided to toss them in the river and hope no one notices. The best kind of customers are the ones who can't write bad Yelp! reviews.
Saturday May 12,
2018
Purchasing Did Not Order Part
Tags delays, excuses, laziness, work ethic, scapegoat, deadline, delay
Transcript
Wally: The purchasing department rejected my request for a key system part because of a typo on their form. But they didn't tell me for three months, so now my product launch will be delayed by that much. Boss: But they finally ordered the part? Wally: I call that unknowable.
Thursday May 17,
2018
Conditions For Wally To Be On The Team
Tags laziness, work ethic, excuses
Transcript
Wally: My boss gave me approval to join your project team under the condition I don't take on any extra work. Woman: The whole point of being on the project is to do extra work. Maybe I should talk to your boss. Wally: His other condition is that you never contact him.
Friday June 22,
2018
Wally's Best Play
Tags excuses, laziness, work ethic, deadline
Transcript
Wally: There are many, many reasons why my project is late and over budget. Boss: Do any of those reasons not involve your incompetence and sloth? Wally: I think my best play here is to be offended by the question.
Friday June 29,
2018
Might Reorganize
Tags responsibility, work ethic, reorganization, merger, laziness
Transcript
Wally: Are you still considering a reorganization of the department? Boss: Maybe. Wally: Oh, good. I was worried I might be held accountable for my lack of accomplishments. Boss: I might be playing this wrong. Wally: Hey, everyone! We're free!


