Share Knowledge Comic Strips - Page 18
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200 Results for Share Knowledge
View 171 - 180 results for share knowledge comic strips. Discover the best "Share Knowledge" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday October 19,
2013
Tags #complaining, #conversation, #dumb people, #ignorance (knowledge), #project taking long
Transcript
Boss: Why is your project taking longer than expected? Dilbert: It's only taking longer than dumb people expected. Boss: Still, that's a lot of people. Dilbert: What can I say to make this conversation end?
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday October 22,
2013
Tags #choosing, #stress, #vacations, #unlimited vacation days, #torpedo career, #source of stress, #set up, #manipulate
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert: We're jumping on the fad of giving employees unlimited vacation days. The only gating factor will be the knowledge that taking any time off whatsoever will torpedo your career. Alice: So... now our vacations will be a source of stress? Catbert: Only as much as you want. It's totally up to you.
Saturday October 26,
2013
Tags #conversation, #ignorance (knowledge), #futurists, #know how, #create entire universe, #brown bag lunches, #slurp
Transcript
Alice: Futurists say that someday humans will have the know-how to create an entire universe. Boss: Where would they put it? Alice: We should do these brown bag lunches less often.
Saturday November 16,
2013
Tags #deception, #ignorance (knowledge), #competitors, #brain waves, #shielded helmet, #company secrets, #trash can
Transcript
Wally: Our competitors have technology for reading brain waves at a distance. This shielded helmet will prevent them from reading the company secrets in your mind. You owe me $20. Dilbert: The bet was that he has to wear the trash can for a week.
Wednesday December 11,
2013
Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #thinking, #vet idea, #incompetent, #annoying, #wrong
Transcript
Boss: Did you vet this idea with your peers? Dilbert: They hated it. They also say you're incompetent and annoying, so how much can we really trust their opinion? Boss: It does sound as if they're wrong a lot. Dilbert: Exactly.
Friday December 13,
2013
Tags #discussion, #executives, #ignorance (knowledge), #culture of innovation, #less work, #stop criticizing
Transcript
CEO: We need to foster a culture of innovation. Does anyone have an idea how we can do that? Dilbert: You could give us less work and you could stop criticizing every idea we have. CEO: Does anyone have a suggestion that isn't ridiculous?
Saturday January 25,
2014
Tags #frustration, #ignorance (knowledge), #project team, #forrest fire, #dropping baby, #analogy, #available people, #stop progress
Transcript
Boss: Alice, I'm adding Jeff to your project team. Alice: That's like trying to put out a forest fire by dropping a baby on it. Boss: I'm available to help, too. Alice: Okay, your job is to keep Jeff from doing anything.
Sunday February 23,
2014
Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #thinking, #objection to plan, #potential problems, #works fine, #system used, #non zero chance, #get rid of hospitals, #idiot, #normal life
Transcript
Dilbert: Does anyone have an objection to this plan? Coworker: In my opinion, there are too many potential problems. Dilbert: This system has been used for years in other places and works fine. Coworker: There is still a non-zero chance of problems. Dilbert: By that logic, we should get rid of hospitals because sometimes they make mistakes. Coworker: Gaaa!!! I just realized I'm an idiot! Dilbert: You can still lead a normal life. Wally: It only stings for a minute.
Tuesday February 18,
2014
Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #sleeping & waking up, #five hours of sleep, #sleep deprivation, #lowers intelligence, #1000% raise
Transcript
Boss: I'm training myself to get by on five hours of sleep per night. Carol: Studies show that sleep deprivation lowers your functional intelligence. Boss: Not it not be doesn't. Carol? Can I have a thousand percent raise?
Saturday March 01,
2014
Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #obstinacy, #studies show, #offering customers, #problem, #prevent success, #many otions, #hinderance
Transcript
Dilbert: Studies show that offering customers too many options can prevent them from buying. Boss: Studies?? That doesn't sound like a real thing. Dilbert: I don't know what to do now. Boss: Maybe that's the problem.