Success Rate Comic Strips - Page 18
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Character
198 Results for Success Rate
View 171 - 180 results for success rate comic strips. Discover the best "Success Rate" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday September 23,
2015
Alice Networks With Ted
Tags #lunch, #gender, #Women, #business, #success, #double standard, #attraction, #networking, #mixed signals, #flirt, #misinterpretation
Transcript
Alice: Hey, Ted! Are you free for lunch today? Ted: I'm happily married! Leave me alone! Alice: Relax. I only want to network with you. Ted: Is it because I'm ugly?
Tuesday October 13,
2015
It Takes More Than Luck
Tags #success, #intelligence, #privilege, #nepotism, #obliviousness, #confusion
Transcript
CEO: Asok, it takes more than luck to be successful. You also have to be smart. Asok: How did you select your level of intelligence before birth? CEO: I don't understand the question. Asok: Now I am getting mixed messages.
Tuesday January 19,
2016
Ted's Unicorn Startup
Thursday February 11,
2016
Dilbert Is Picked As Company Mascot`
Tags #posture, #mascot, #success, #hunchback, #work ethic, #reward
Transcript
CEO: Management has selected Dilbert to be our new company mascot. His bad posture speaks volumes about his hard work and long hours. Dilbert: Ow! CEO: Did you ever dream you would be so successful? Dilbert: This is exactly how I dreamed it.
Monday June 20,
2016
Wally Heads Up Ai Project
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #project, #fake
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I need you to head up our artificial intelligence project. You will have no budget and no hope of success. I just like saying we're working on AI. And you're completely useless, so it's a good match. Wally: I won't let you down.
Monday August 22,
2016
Wally's Inappropriate Attire
Tags #dress code, #outfit, #crop top, #deception, #ploy, #trick, #telecommuting, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: That is inappropriate office attire! Go home and work remotely for the rest of the day. Dilbert: How'd it work out? Wally: Phase one was a total success. Phase two involves napping.
Wednesday October 05,
2016
Ranked By Performance
Monday November 28,
2016
World's Saddest Club
Tags #catch-22, #deadline, #lose-lose, #choosing
Transcript
Man: Can you get that analysis to me by Tuesday? Alice: Yes, if I do it poorly. Alternately, I can do it well and miss your deadline by a week. Man: That gives me no path to success. Alice: Welcome to the world's saddest club.
Wednesday March 22,
2017
Wally's Invention Goes Into Production
Tags #invention, #success, #laziness, #fairness, #unfair
Transcript
Alice: The board decided to put your invention of a phone charger that warms coffee into production. Market surveys show enormous demand. You're probably going to be our Employee Of The Year. This disturbs me on many levels. Wally: Genius is often disruptive.
Thursday March 23,
2017
Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever
Tags #success, #Promotion, #management, #work, #laziness
Transcript
Boss: The product you accidentally invented is our biggest seller in company history. So I'm promoting you to a leadership position. Wally: Phew! I thought you were going to make me work.