Waited At House Comic Strips - Page 18

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

180 Results for Waited At House

View 171 - 180 results for waited at house comic strips. Discover the best "Waited At House" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Hoards Gold Unless Hungry

Thank you for voting.
Boss Hoards Gold Unless Hungry - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 2015's comic on:


Tags #gold, #apocalypse, #money, #Food, #priorities, #hunger, #fool

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You'll be sorry when the world economy collapses. But I'll be okay because I hoarded gold at my house. Alice: On day two, you'll trade all of it for a sandwich. Boss: Only if I'm hungry.

Hairdresser Illuminati

Thank you for voting.
 Hairdresser Illuminati - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 2015's comic on:


Tags #hair, #haircut, #hairstyles, #success, #Politics, #candidates, #secret organization, #secret society, #control

View Transcript

Transcript

The Hairdresser Illuminati. Dogbert: Before we start, I'll need to see a list of your political views. Hoo-boy, this is some crazy stuff. I have just the right hairstyle for this. There. That should keep you out of The White House.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 08, 2015's comic on:


Tags #social, #party, #invite, #relationships, #friend, #friendship, #test, #popularity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm having some people over to my house after work. Would you like to come? Woman: Who else is coming? Dilbert: Seven people said maybe, and one said he would get back to me. I think that shows a lot of interest. So how about it? Can you come? Woman: It depends on whether my sister needs a ride to the airport. Dilbert: When will you know? Woman: I'll text you. Dogbert: Are you sad that no one came? Dilbert: No, I was just A-B testing to see if I still hate all of them.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #complaining, #problems, #salutation, #sincerity, #insincere, #questioning, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Thanks for meeting me on short notice. How are you? Coworker: Well, actually, someone stole my identity and ruined my credit score. I couldn't refinance my loan and lost my house. So I ate myself into poor health. I stopped shaving for a month and ended up on the terrorist watchlist. My boss hates me and is trying to make me quit by giving me bad assignments. My car broke down and I haven't been hugged in a year. Dilbert: Okay, let's get started. Coworker: That's all the time I had.

Wally's Lateness Excuse

Thank you for voting.
Wally's Lateness Excuse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #excuse, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why are you two hours late for work? Wally: Your wife didn't want to bother you, so she called me and asked if I would go to your house and see if she left her curling iron plugged in. Do you believe me, or do you want to risk being the first person she calls next time. Boss: Well played.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #punctuality, #late, #excuses, #traffic, #sleep, #time management, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Sorry I'm late. Traffic was terrible. Dilbert: Isn't the traffic from your house always terrible at this time of day? Tina: Exactly! That's why I'm late every day. Dilbert: Do you see any way you could fix that? Tina: I can't control the traffic. Dilbert: You could leave earlier. Tina: Then I wouldn't get enough sleep. Dilbert; You could go to bed earlier. Tina: Then I wouldn't have time to watch Netflix until two in the morning. Do you want me to hate my life? Dilbert: I didn't until now.

Alice And The Legacy System

Thank you for voting.
Alice And The Legacy System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 2017's comic on:


Tags #dedication, #work ethic, #boredom, #overwork, #time

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Does it bother you to work on the old legacy system when the rest of us are doing exciting new things? Wally: I leave work at 4 p.m. every day. Wally: How about you? Alice: Squatters keep moving into my house.

Tina Has Phone Anxiety

Thank you for voting.
Tina Has Phone Anxiety - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #boredom, #time, #killing time, #anxiety, #addiction, #distraction, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: I'm having a lot of anxiety because my mobile phone is broken. What happens if I need to stand in line for something? What would I do while I waited? Dilbert: You need an invisible friend. Tina: I have one, but she's always on her phone.

Asok Lives In The Office

Thank you for voting.
Asok Lives In The Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 17, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #cost, #criticism, #house, #office, #office workers, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: All of you should be more like Asok. He is in the office before I arrive and still here when I go home. Asok: That is because housing costs are so high that I live here in the office and sleep in a bathroom stall. Boss: That still leaves a lot of stalls for the rest of you.

Housing Costs

Thank you for voting.
Housing Costs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2019's comic on:


Tags #cost, #discussion, #homeless persons, #house

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Housing costs are so high that I had to move into a restroom stall. Man: I live in the park under a pile of wet cardboard. Asok: Have you tried a stall? Man: No, I'm too outdoorsy for that.