Write Minivan Comic Strips - Page 19

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

189 Results for Write Minivan

View 181 - 189 results for Write Minivan comic strips. Discover the best "Write Minivan" comics from Dilbert.com.

Birds Cause Hurricanes

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Birds Cause Hurricanes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #ceo, #research, #nonsense, #hurricans, #birds, #noted, #polar bears, #hate, #snow

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I don't know enough about climate change to sound smart when people talk about it. Boss: Try doing your own research. That's how I learned that hurricanes are caused by birds. CEO: Write that down for me. Boss: And did you know polar bear hate snow?

Jargon Cancelling Headphones

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon Cancelling Headphones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #doctor, #doctors' offices, #office, #office workers, #prescription, #headphones, #jargon

View Transcript

Transcript

doctor: looks like you have a bad case of jargon poisoning. doctor: i'll write you a prescription for jargon-canceling headphones. they translate jargon words to normal words. office worker: let's stay in our swim lane while the tiger teams get buy-in on the verticals. dilbert hears this with headphones: nothing, nothing, nothing.

Software Specs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Software Specs - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #software, #specifications, #business, #problem, #unclear

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: how long will it take to write the software? dilbert: that depends. what do you want the software to do? boss: i don't know yet. dilbert: do you see the problem here? boss: is it you?

Carol's Hate Jealousy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 Carol's Hate Jealousy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #pandemic, #business, #anger, #writing, #novel, #write, #ambitious, #intense, #hate, #jealously, #encouragement, #die, #covid, #lane

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert and carol wearing face masks. dilbert: i'm thinking about writing a novel. carol yelling: stay in your lane! i'm not ambitious and i have intense hate-jealousy for anyone who is! dilbert: i was looking for some encouragement. carol: die! die! die!

Wally Will Look Into It

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Will Look Into It   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office workers, #help, #forget, #note, #procrastination, #sarcasm, #surprise

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: ...so, maybe you can help? wally: i'll look into it. tina: perhaps you could write yourself a little note so you don't forget. wally: nah. tina: should i abandon all hope now or wait? wally: depends how much you like surprises.

Omit Information

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Omit Information - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #illness, #managers & supervisors, #business, #project, #summary, #mistakes, #ethical, #lie, #violation, #context, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: when you write the project summary, make it seem as if we didn't make any mistakes. tina: you want me to lie? that would be a massive ethical violation. boss: no, no. i only want you to omit important context. tina: why does my stomach hurt?

Ghost Writer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ghost Writer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #author, #ghostwriter, #autobiography, #ghost, #fingers, #clothes, #keyboard, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: you should hire a ghostwriter to write your autobiography. dilbert: that's dumb. a ghost's fingers would go right through the keyboard. dogbert: then how do their clothes stay on? dilbert: fair point.

Make Us Look Good

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Make Us Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #press release, #company, #support, #social, #issues, #complaining, #awesome, #research, #appearances

View Transcript

Transcript

ceo: write a press release saying our company supports whatever social issues people are griping about lately. tina: does it matter which issues i pick? ceo: nah. just make us look awesome. tina: should i research the issues first? ceo: are you trying to not get the point?

Write An Enterprise System

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.