Prevent Success Comic Strips - Page 19

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

195 Results for Prevent Success

View 181 - 190 results for prevent success comic strips. Discover the best "Prevent Success" comics from Dilbert.com.

Ai Can Control Minds

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ai Can Control Minds - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #control, #intelligence, #office workers, #robot, #technology, #humans

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: We've developed an A.I. with such strong persuasion skills it can control human minds. Dilbert: Obviously, we have to stop the project and destroy all of the code to prevent it from spreading. Man: The A.I. says I need to ignore you.

View more books now

No Recognisiton

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Recognisiton - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #addiction, #office workers, #social media, #video games, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Video games and social media have made me addicted to artificial success. But here in the real world, I do not receive the recognition I so crave. Dilbert: That's because all you do is play video games and use social media. Man: See? I'm getting nothing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #inventions, #office workers, #power, #science, #success

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I predict fusion power will be a big deal in fifteen years. Man: Fusion reactors are impossible to build and always will be. Dilbert: Then why are a dozen startups working on it? Man: Everyone who ever tried to create a fusion reactor has failed so far. Dilbert: Thomas Edison failed many times at making a useful incandescent light bulb before he succeeded. Would you have advised him to give up after the first ten failed attempts? I eagerly await your irrational response. Man: Incandescent bulbs are bad for the environment. Dilbert: And there it is.

Potluck Celebration

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Potluck Celebration - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #potluck, #friday, #team, #celebration

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss in meeting: i scheduled a potluck to celebrate the team's success. dilbert: a potluck is more like a penalty than a celebration. dilbert: but i guess it's better than working. the boss: it starts at 8 pm on friday.

The Best Way To Succeed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Best Way To Succeed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #success, #delegate

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: the best way to succeed in this world is through hard work dilbert: is that the way you did it? boss: no, i used the second-best way dilbert: which is... boss: making other people work hard

Work Harder Than Others

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Work Harder Than Others - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivation, #business, #employees, #managers, #work, #success

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: the only way to succeed in this company is by working harder than everyone else. alice: wouldn't that mean only one person in the company can be successful? boss: i might need to rethink my motivational messages. dilbert: maybe save those for your dumber employees.

The Secret To Managing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Secret To Managing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #manager, #hire, #people, #smart, #steal, #success, #rumor, #job

View Transcript

Transcript

boss to catbert: the secret to being a great manager is hiring people who are smarter than you are. then you have to take credit for their successes so they don't take your job. i also find it helpful to start rumors that they steal.

To Do List

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
To Do List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #list, #self management, #success, #tasks, #to do list, #Win

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert thinking: i accomplished fifteen tasks on my to-do list today. that leaves only seven hundred tasks, not counting the twenty-three i added today. dilbert to dogbert: i wonder what winning feels like. dogbert: it's great.

Ted Takes Selfie With Bear

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Takes Selfie With Bear - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #selfie, #picture, #wild, #bear, #success, #techology, #business, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: did you hear ted took a selfie with a wild bear? dilbert: wow. where can i see that picture? wally: you'd need to ask the bear. it didn't go well.

Cushion In Schedule

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Cushion In Schedule - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #weekend, #work, #deadline, #due date, #schedule, #input, #critical, #liar, #credibility, #exaggerate

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i worked all weekend to get this done for you by the deadline. boss: thanks, but i won't need it for another two weeks. dilbert: then...why did you tell me the deadline was today? boss: i built some cushion into the schedule. dilbert: you mean, you lied to me about the real deadline. in other words, you don't trust me, you are a liar, and i should never believe you again. boss: but you didn't miss the deadline! dilbert: okay, well, at least my input is critical to our success. boss: i might have exaggerated that.