Sleep On Job Comic Strips - Page 19

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Sleep On Job

View 181 - 190 results for sleep on job comic strips. Discover the best "Sleep On Job" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #own luxury, #motor coach, #work and sleep, #parking lot, #best fanatasy, #tv

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Alice, and Wally are eating lunch. Wally says, "My fantasy is to own a luxury motor coach." Wally continues, "I'd drive it to work and sleep all day in the parking lot. It would be like paradise." Dilbert responds, "That's your best fantasy?" Wally says, "It would also have a TV, in case I woke up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cost cutting, #job for a day, #dream of grave, #less motivating

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Carol with another man. The Boss says, "Our department won the cost-cutting contest, so our CEO will do your job for a day." The CEO sits in Carol's cubicle and says, "I feel like a failure.. darkness fills my days... I dream of the grave." The CEO cries, "I'll never be loved again!!" The Boss says, "This is less motivating than I'd hoped."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job not stimulating, #togers, #toger meat, #analogy, #zebra

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says to The Boss, "My job is not stimulating my mind." Asok continues, "If you want to have tigers, you must feed them tiger meat." Asok adds, "But that is only an analogy. Please do not make me eat a zebra."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #switch to decaf, #secretly, #office, #employees sleeping, #sleep on job

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol is sitting on a doctor's examination table. The doctor says, "Switch to decaf for a while. That should help." Back at the office, Alice holds bag of coffee in her hands and thinks, "I'll replace all the office coffee with decaf for my convenience." In the hallway, The Boss, Alice, and Dilbert are all asleep on the floor. Wally is slumped down; he thinks, "Must...find... antidote."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #a bad day, #a worse day, #a much worse day, #ne job online, #trying to fill, #unqaulified

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: A Bad Day. Dilbert stands in front of his computer and says, "Maybe it's time to look for a new job online." Headline: A Worse Day. Dilbert sits at his computer and says, "Hey, that's my job they're trying to fill." Headline: A Much Worse Day. Dilbert sits in his cubicle and says, "And I'm unqualified."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #everyones opinion, #Advice, #best job, #crazy ideas, #mental, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "I'll get everyone's opinion, and then I'll make my decision." Alice: "Translation: you'll take the advice of whoever does the best job of trash-talking everyone else." The Boss: "Where do you get these crazy ideas?" Dilbert: "She's mental."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #phd degrees, #no common sense, #interview, #job interview, #not good to say

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Wow! You have three masters degrees and a PHD!" "Yes, it's all very impressive, but interestingly, I have no common sense whatsoever." "That's not the sort of thing you should say during a job interview." "I don't see why not."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #project manager, #returned calls, #emails, #mentally superior, #finished porject, #sleep national holidays

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: "Since I became project manager, no one has returned my calls or responded to my e-mails." Asok: "Luckily, I'm an I.I.T. graduate, mentally superior to most people on Earth, so I finished the project myself." Wally: "Are you tired?" Asok: "I am trained to only sleep during national holidays."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #disloyal ingrate, #evil dircetor, #inform boss, #internal job open, #new policy

View Transcript

Transcript

CatBert: "Evil H.R. Director." "New policy: You must inform your boss before applying for an internal job opening." "PURRRRRRRRR." The Boss: "Well, good luck, you disloyal, back-stabbing ingrate."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #guest cartoonist, #nildo orbfutz, #consulting, #welocme, #breakroom, #on the job training

View Transcript

Transcript

"Who's today's guest cartoonist?" "At great expense, I've just hired Nildo Orbfutz as a consultant. He will increase our productivity hereby calculating how much time is actually wasted!" "Well, Nildo. How did you acquire your credentials? Degree in business management? HR? PR? Psychology?" "On-the-job training." "Let me guess: you've been fired from every job you ever had... for wasting time?" "Welcome to the wonderfuk world of consulting." "Answer: go to Dilbert.com."