Myself Comic Strips - Page 19

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

183 Results for Myself

View 181 - 183 results for myself comic strips. Discover the best "Myself" comics from Dilbert.com.

Robot Has A Cyborg

Thank you for voting.
Robot Has A Cyborg - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 2019's comic on:


Tags #insults, #Kids, #office workers, #robot, #technology, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.

Wally Has Best Excuse

Thank you for voting.
Wally Has Best Excuse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #business, #office, #office workers, #success

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: i was tempted to succeed this week, but i caught myself in time. wally: success would improve my odds of mating, and i don't think you want more people like me in this world. the boss: that is officially the best excuse for not working that i have ever heard. wally: shhh! don't compliment me in public!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #office, #office workers, #pay raise, #employee of the year

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i'm looking for nominations for employee of the year. the boss: does anyone have a suggestion? dilbert: hypothetically, would the winner of this award be likely to get a larger-than-normal pay raise? the boss: i would think so, yes. dilbert: and is it true that our budget for raises is limited? the boss: yes, of course. dilbert: would it not be against my best interests to nominate an employee who is competing with me for scarce resources? the boss: let's just forget i brought it up. dilbert: i nominate myself.