Pro Bono Job Comic Strips - Page 19

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910 Results for Pro Bono Job

View 181 - 190 results for pro bono job comic strips. Discover the best "Pro Bono Job" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 2004's comic on:


Tags #single source vendor, #job offer, #vp title, #waiting eriod

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The boss: Okay, I convinced my company to make you our single source vendor. I assume you'll be make me a job offer now. any vp title will be fine. I'll just take an empty office. There ...is...a...waiting period!!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 2004's comic on:


Tags #sexy project, #boost career, #sound good better job, #nano tech nology, #fighting terrorists

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The Boss: I need to be managing a sexier project to boost my career. \it only has to sound good and not fail until I geta better job. How about a nanotechnology set cell for fighting terrorists? Dilbert: O-O-OKay.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2004's comic on:


Tags #bottle neck bill, #do his job, #miscellaneous

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Dilbert: "I need your help forcing Bottleneck Bill to do his job so I can do my job." "I'll be all over that... as soon as I finish other things." "What other things?" "Well, for example, miscellaneous."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2004's comic on:


Tags #online ereume, #older chubby men, #key words, #married men, #job offers, #cousin, #Advice, #one line job hunting

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"I wasn't getting any responses to my online resume until I inserted some key words." "I said I'm strangely attracted to older, chubby, married men with coffee-stained teeth." "That is wrong on so many levels." "Explain that to my six thousand job offers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #objectives are vague, #unmeasurable, #not inspired, #achieve full ptential, #bad job

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"I am concerned because my objectivess are vague and unmeasurable." "As a result, I am not inspired to achieve my full potential... and... um..." "Did I just say I'm doing a bad job and ask you to punish me?" "That's what I heard."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2004's comic on:


Tags #combined, #dating service, #online job site, #system

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"I combined an online dating service with an online job site and an online auction site." "You tell the system everything about yourself and see if anyone wants any of it." ""I wouldn't date you or hire you, but I'll bid a dollar for your refrigerator.""

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 1999's comic on:


Tags #Wally, #meeting, #does nothing, #angrily identify problems, #not job, #ambiguous, #taking forever, #business

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The Boss, Wally, Dilbert, and others are in a meeting. Wally raises his hand and says, "Someone should take care of that problem!" Dilbert turns to Wally and says, "YOU should take care of it." Wally replies, "I can't do everything." Alice says, "You don't do anything." Asok adds, "Not a single thing." Wally says, "It's my job to angrily identify problems." The Boss, with his head in his hands, interjects, "Wally..." The Boss continues, "This is NOT your job!" Wally asks, "What?" Wally is up in arms as he says to the Boss, "Everything is so ambiguous here! Someone should take care of that problem!" Turning to Dilbert, Wally adds, "Is it just me, or is this meeting taking forever?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 07, 1999's comic on:


Tags #newly designated, #fire warden, #bitter, #assignment, #regular job, #last one out, #safety, #fire, #panic, #flushing self, #exit door

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Wally is standing at a large pad with the word "SAFETY" on it, heading a meeting. Wally says, "I'm the newly designated fire warden for this floor." Wally continues, "You might expect me to be bitter about this assignment." ..."Granted, it tells the world I wasn't productive at my regular job." The group looks on as Wally continues, "And if the building burns, I'm expected to be the last one out." Turning over the page on the pad saying, "But my only concern is your safety. The large pad now reveals a sketch of three little stick figures running with the word "AAAGH!" above them. Wally explains, "In the event of a fire, don't be too proud to panic." The next page is a sketch of a stick figure, flying head first, into a toilet. Wally says, "If the windows won't open, try flushing yourself to safety. ..."And never, ever get between me and the exit door." The boss interrupts, "Wally..."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2002's comic on:


Tags #best, #hire back, #not old job, #sales, #train you to lie, #worst, #desparate, #take anything, #need money, #job, #take advantage of, #business

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Catbert says to Dilbert, "We can hire you back but not at your old job." Dilbert responds, "That's okay. I'll do anything but sales. I would be the worst salesperson on Earth." Catbert says, "It's sales." Dilbert replies, "Did I just say worst when I meant best?" Catbert responds, "We'll have to train you to lie better."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 09, 2005's comic on:


Tags #rat problem, #reporting, #rat bait, #unwashed, #job satisfaction, #calling names, #being mean

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Carol: We're having a problem with the rats in the office. " You might want to upgrade your level of hygiene from "rat bait" to "unwashed."" "I think I just felt my first tingle of job satisfaction."