Quality Assurance Group Comic Strips - Page 19

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256 Results for Quality Assurance Group

View 181 - 190 results for quality assurance group comic strips. Discover the best "Quality Assurance Group" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 1999's comic on:


Tags #compensation, #manage, #career as director, #conpsiracy, #incompetent emplyees

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Catbert stands on The Bosses desk and says, "Your compensation is related to the number of people you manage." Catbert says, "Likewise, my career as director of human resources depends on the quantity of employees." Alice and Dilbert look at a group of dumb people. Alice says, "It's as if there were a conspiracy to hire hordes of incompetent employees."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 1999's comic on:


Tags #hacker, #broke into system, #corporate startegy, #post it, #internet, #email address, #technology

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The boss, Dilbert, Alice and Wally are in a meeting. The boss is looking at a piece of paper and says to the group, "A hacker broke into our system and found out our corporate strategy." Dilbert asks, "Did he post it on the internet? I'd like to read it." Dilbert continues, "I'm also curious about my objectives for the year. Do you have the guy's e-mail address?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1999's comic on:


Tags #the turnaround ceo, #work of 10 people, #strategic planning, #traitorous mole

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The Turnaround CEO Dilbert is standing in front of the CEO's desk saying, "If you let me keep my job, I'll do the work of ten people." The CEO looks like the devil. Dilbert goes on, "Specifically, it would be the ten people in our strategic planning group." Dilbert says, "They don't do much." The CEO replies, "I'd like you to be my traitorous mole."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2000's comic on:


Tags #bait and switch, #assisting eddie, #never see again

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The boss, Wally, Dilbert and a new consultant are in a meeting. The boss says: "I hired the "Bait and Switch" consulting group because they're so smart." The consultant says to the boss while introducing him to a very messy looking man: "I'm assigning Eddie to work on your account. You will never see me again." Eddie sits in front of the boss and says: "So, what is it that you do here?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2000's comic on:


Tags #website, #business case, #web productivity commitee, #technology

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Dilbert tells the Boss who is sitting behind his desk: "I need to see a web site that's blocked by our I.S. Group." The Boss replies: "Submit a business case to the Web Productivity and Security Committee." A snail approaches Dilbert while he is typing at his terminal and says to him: "Hey, bro, where's your shell? This ain't casual day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2000's comic on:


Tags #dogcart consults, #e commerce sight, #well documented, #flying pigs, #coolest part

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Dogbert consults the Boss. Dogbert says, "My team can build an e-commerce site for you." Dogbert continues, "It will be so well-documented that your I.S. group can easily maintain it." The Boss gathers his employees as he explains, "But the coolest part is that the documentation will be delivered by flying pigs."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2000's comic on:


Tags #staff cuts, #target t shirt, #special target

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The Boss says to his staff during a meeting, "This special T-shirt is awarded to Ted for all of his achievements." The Boss continues, "Next on the agenda..." Ted attempts to put on the T-shirt which has a bullseye on the front. The Boss says to the group, "We're planning some staff cuts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2001's comic on:


Tags #83% spat, #customer satisfaction survey, #the lucky ones, #died of dehydration, #results of survey

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A female employee says to The Boss and Wally, "The results of our customer satisfaction survey are in." The female employee says, "83% spat at their telephones until they died of dehydration." Asok the Intern, The Boss and Wally listen as the female employee continues, "We're calling that group 'The Lucky Ones'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2001's comic on:


Tags #afraid to eat sandwhiches, #eat sandwhiches, #focus group, #truth telling, #vendor

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Dilbert says, "Wally, you have to see this vendor." Wally asks, "Why?" Dilbert says, "I think he's telling the truth." Wally exclaims, "No way!" Dilbert and Wally watch the vendor talking to Asok the Intern. The vendor says to Asok, "When the focus groups saw this product they were afraid to eat our sandwiches."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2001's comic on:


Tags #creativity exercise, #device, #converts air to electricty, #create a missle, #defense laser, #scissors holder

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Headline: Creativity Exercise. A man stands in front of a machine and says to a group, "Team One made a device that converts air to electricity." The man stands in front of a different group. He claps and says, "Team Two used their hour to create a missile defense laser." The man approaches Dilbert, The Boss, Alice, and Wally and asks, "Team Three, do you need more time?" The Boss responds, "It's a scissors holder!"