Agree Comic Strips - Page 2
70 Results for Agree
View 11 - 20 results for agree comic strips. Discover the best "Agree" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share January 09, 2011's comic on:
Worker: I have to disagree with you , dilbert. Gilbert: Actually, you odnt disagree with me, Worker: I dont? Dilbert: No, You think you disagree with me, but your mistaken. Dilbert: You're simply experiencing an illusion caused by the limits of your comprehension. If you were able to fully comprehend both the problem and my recommendation solution, you would agree with me. Dilbert: So what appears to be a difference of opinion if just you wrestling with your own defective brain. Dilbert: There's no reason to get the rest of us involved in that mess. Have you ever noticed that clarity makes people angry?
Share December 21, 2007's comic on:
Wally: "Your staff meeting will take an hour of my life that I will never get back." "If you let me skip the meeting, I will agree, to die an hour earlier to make up the difference." Dilbert: "He agreed?" Wally: "Yes, and I'm going to use that extra hour of deadness to haunt hum."
Share February 27, 2005's comic on:
"Your project deadline is next month, and I can't imagine you finishing on time." "So I dinged you on your annual performance review." "But... I will finish on time." "Well, let's agree to disagree."<r>"What?!" "You're basing my raise on what you IMAGINE I won't do in the furture!" "Relax. If you do finish the project on time, I'll factor it into your next annual review." "Well... Okay. I guess it all averages out." One Year Later "Remember the project that I finished last year?" "No. But the new one looks like it will be late."
Share October 13, 2002's comic on:
The Boss points to a slide and says, "The three pillars of our pyramid are communication, integrity, and teamwork." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Since when do pyramids have pillars?" The Boss responds, "Answer: Shut up." Alice raises her hand and says, "Problem: All of my team members are idiots." Alice continues, "If I communicate my honest opinion of their ideas, I won't be a team player." Alice continues, "But if I pretend to agree with their bad ideas, I won't have integrity." Alice continues, "So instead of being a pyramid, can I be a two-legged stool like you?" Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "Wow! That was much better than my pillar question." Wally asks Alice, "Aren't I on your team?"
Share March 18, 2014's comic on:
Share May 13, 2015's comic on:
Boss: Stop agreeing with me in ways that sound like you don't mean it. Dilbert: Experts say one should first agree with idiots to gain trust before trying to change their minds. Boss: You need to stop doing that. Dilbert: You are so right about that.
Share March 25, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: We need to upgrade some of our servers. Coworker: That's dumb. We upgraded two of them last week. Dilbert: Right now we need to upgrade the rest of them. Coworker: Then why did you say we have to upgrade all of them? Dilbert: Well, I didn't. But I think we all agree on what needs to be done. Coworker: Not if you insist on upgrading the servers we already upgraded last week. Dilbert: Gaaaa!!! Kill me with a comet!!! Coworker: Does he ever say anything that makes sense? Wally: There's no way to be sure.
Share April 07, 2012's comic on:
Wally: IF you agree to give me no work, I will agree to not sue you with some sort of bogus employee claim. My existence will make your empire seem larger, and stockholders will get stuck with the bill for my paycheck. Boss: Why does that seem like a fair plan? Wally: We live in an awful world.
Share July 13, 2012's comic on:
Dogbert: Venture capitalists gave us $10 million, but I had to agree to put one ion them on board. TED: Should I be worried that your other board members have a combined I.Q of about 70? Dogbert: They weren't dumb enough to give me $10 million dollars. alligator: Burn!
Share October 12, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert walk outdoors. Dilbert says, "Somewhere out there is the woman who is perfect for me." They sit down and Dilbert continues, "But how will I recognize her? How will I know she's the one?" The caption says, "Meanwhile, somewhere 'out there' . . ." A woman who looks like Dilbert says to her cat, "Okay, I agree that it SEEMS like cats own people, but it's not actually the law."