Airline Distracted Comic Strips - Page 2
26 Results for Airline Distracted
View 11 - 20 results for airline distracted comic strips. Discover the best "Airline Distracted" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share October 08, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert approaches the "Air Elbonia" counter and says to the clerk, "Give me one ticket for the slingshot flight to Elbonia's capital." The airline ticket agent asks, "Do you want first class or coach?" Dilbert asks, "What's the difference?" The clerk replies, "With first class we don't intentionally fling you toward something hard."
Share December 23, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk and says into the telephone, "I'd like a direct flight . . . Aisle seat . . . And an upgrade to first class if possible." The airline ticket agent replies, "The best I can do is to put you in an overhead luggage bin . . . With one stop in North Korea." Dilbert asks, "Is it non-smoking?" The ticket salesperson replies, "That depends on how accurate the anti-aircraft fire is."
Share December 24, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert sits at a table with stacks of brochures in front of him. Dogbert stands on the table and says, "This is Marilyn Vos Savant, the smartest human alive." A woman stands behind Dogbert. Dogbert says, "She will help you understand your airline 'Often Flier' program." Marilyn looks at a brochure and says, "I'm stumped." Dilbert asks, "After this, could you tell me which phone company saves me the most money?" Marilyn replies, "My brain's trying to escape; you scared it." Her brain crawls out her ear.
Share April 22, 1998's comic on:
Dilbert goes up to the airline desk at the airport. Woman behind the counter says, "Before I check you in, let me explain something.." Woman says, "You're here for a technology conference. I am the only attractive woman who will talk to you for days. I am not free for coffee later." Dilbert asks, "Can I brush your hand when you give me the key?" Woman says, "I'll toss it to you."
Share November 28, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit in an airplane. Dogbert says, "I'm starving. Is there a meal on this flight?" Dilbert replies, "It's probably just a snack. The airline is cutting back on frills." Dogbert asks, "When you say 'snack,' do you mean a small but well-balanced culinary experience?" Dilbert answers, "It's peanuts. We get nine peanuts apiece." Dilbert adds, "And a soda . . . But not a whole can, just a little cup . . . Unless they cut back on that too." The flight attendant tells Dilbert, "Now we just drink a soda ourselves and burp your seat number." The flight attendant drinks a can of soda. The flight attendant burps, "7B." Dilbert says, "It's actually kind of refreshing."
Share December 05, 1993's comic on:
Wally and Dilbert stand at the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, I want you to manage Wally's project while he's on vacation in Aruba." The Boss thinks, "Let the shirk-fest games begin." Dilbert asks, "Isn't that the week when everything is due?" Wally says, "Coincidence." Dilbert says to Wally, "Maybe you could change your plans." Wally holds up his airline tickets and says, "Non-refundable tickets right here!" Dilbert says, "The project can't be important if you won't change your plans." Wally thinks, "He's GOOD." Dilbert tells the Boss, "I'll be happy to add Wally's project to the bottom of my pile and let it fail with Wally's name on it." Dilbert tells Wally, "When you're in Aruba, study the waiters carefully - it's probably your new career." The Boss thinks, "Two free tickets to Aruba - I win."
Share May 31, 1998's comic on:
Dilbert stands at a pharmacy with two cashiers, each helping a customer. He thinks, "Is this one line, or two?" Dilbert positions himself in the center and thinks, "I'll hedge my bets by standing in the center." A man approaches and Dilbert thinks, "This guy is confused too." The man stands next to Dilbert and Dilbert begins to sweat. He thinks, "Get behind me...get behind me...get behind me...get behind me..." The man smiles and Dilbert thinks "Oh no! He's forming a new line behind the fast cashier! #$@^%#!" The man turns his head and Dilbert jumps in front of him. He thinks, "He's distracted! I take the angle! I win!" The cashier looks at his prescription and says, "Stress medications are the other line."
Share April 27, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert says to The Boss, "...And that's why I need a management decision." The Boss says, "Hi, Bill!" Dilbert says, "But you are too distracted to make an informed decision, so this will be random." The Boss says, "Bob!" Dilbert says, "And here it comes." The Boss replies, "Would 'No' be an answer to anything you said?"
Share February 17, 2009's comic on:
Finance trolls Finance troll says, "Your request for airline travel is denied. We don't have the budget for that." Finance troll says, "Company policy requires you to hitchhike with alleged killers and not offer to pay for gas." Dilbert says, "Well, at least things can't get worse." finance troll says, "Apparently you don't know what 'Alleged' means."
Share January 21, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: From now on, all travel must be booked through the corporate travel web site. Alice: Our travel web site is terrible. It only lets you book the cheapest flight, and that's always on Elbonian Airlines. The Boss: Don't be such a snob. What's wrong with using a discount airline? Alice: Well, they list their destination airports as 'whatever looks soft'. The meals in first class are made of anyone who dies in coach. Their entire security screening process involves shouting at each passenger 'Are you Osama bin Laden?!!!'" "And I once saw a baggage handler wearing my dress. The Boss: Whiner.