Hiring Smart People Comic Strips - Page 2
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1000 Results for Hiring Smart People
View 11 - 20 results for hiring smart people comic strips. Discover the best "Hiring Smart People" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday February 12,
2013
Tags #boss, #coffee, #good managing, #horing, #ignorance (knowledge), #insulting, #managers & supervisors, #smart people, #confontation, #business
Transcript
Boss: Today I learned that the secret of good managing is hiring people who are smarter than I am. Maybe I'll try that next time.
Friday November 23,
2018
Dilbert Teaches The Dumb People
Tags #computers, #insults, #marketing, #office workers, #sales, #teaching, #smart
Transcript
Dilbert: My boss asked me to teach a class on coding because it is hard to find programmers in this job market. Are there any smart people in the class or do you all work in marketing and sales? Voice: What's that supposed to mean? Dilbert: Thank you. Is anyone else in sales?
Wednesday March 07,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #gravity, #illusion, #mental, #restrictions, #smart, #flung, #space, #wheel of fortune
Transcript
Dogbert sits on his pillow thinking, "Sometimes I think gravity is only an illusion." Dogbert thinks, "Maybe other great thinkers realized gravity is mental and were thus freed of its restrictions." Dogbert thinks, "Which could explain why all the smart people have apparently been flung into space." Dilbert enters and says, "It's time for 'Wheel of Fortune.'"
Friday March 27,
2015
Wally Won't Oversupply Wisdom
Tags #economist, #Promotion, #jargon, #babble, #deception, #smart people, #obliviousness
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO wants to promote you to Chief Economist because nothing you say makes sense. He thinks that's the sign of a great economist. Wally: It totally is. Boss: Say something smart. Wally: Whoa! I don't want to create an oversupply of wisdom.
Tuesday July 28,
2015
Hire Smarter People
Tags #leadership, #success, #insult, #power, #compliment, #backhanded compliment, #ego, #humility, #humble
Transcript
CEO: The secret to my success is that I hire people who are smarter than me. And then I tell those smart people exactly what to do. It keeps you humble. Dilbert: Good, because all of this was starting to go to my head.
Saturday March 26,
2016
Simplify The Slide
Tags #intelligence, #insult, #smart, #dumb, #powerpoint, #guest artist, #joel friday
Transcript
Boss: You need to simplify that slide. Dilbert: Did you understand it? Boss: Yes. Dilbert: Then why do you think smart people will be confused? Boss: I can't tell if that was an insult. Dilbert: Ask a smart person.
Tuesday September 29,
2020
Critics Not Intelligent
Tags #intelligence, #office workers, #employees, #smart, #critics, #agreement, #face mask
Transcript
alice: i've noticed that none of my critics are intelligent. smart people always seem to agree with me. dilbert: what makes you think they are smart? alice: because they agree with me. i have to give you a maskless "duh" for that. alice pulls off face mask: duh!
Sunday April 21,
1996
Tags #ken from sales, #nobody buys, #current prodcut, #new version, #entire product line, #biggest comepetitor, #brisk sales, #commissions galore, #justice, #idiots punished
Transcript
A man says to Dilbert, "Yo, Dil-man!" Dilbert sits at his desk and thinks, "Uh-oh, it's Ken from sales." Ken says, "I told our biggest customers how great our next product will be. Now nobody will buy our current product." Ken asks, "When will the new version be available?" Dilbert replies, "In a year or two." Ken looks shocked. Ken says, "Hmm . . . I seem to have single-handedly destroyed an entire product line." Ken continues, "Luckily our biggest competitor is hiring sales people. And I'm betting THEY'LL have brisk sales this year! Commissions galore!" Dilbert thinks, "If there's justice in this world, the idiots will be punished . . ." Dilbert thinks, ". . . Before they get promoted." The Boss tells Dilbert, "Um . . . We need the new version by Tuesday."
Thursday May 09,
2002
Tags #training cd, #gone bad, #brainwashing, #cyborg, #brain washed
Transcript
Dilbert, Asok, and Wally are eating lunch. Asok says, "My training CD has gone bad. It is brainwashing me to become a cyborg." Dilbert responds, "Don't worry. Smart people such as you can't be brainwashed to do stupid things." Asok has transformed into half cyborg. He approaches Dilbert and says, "Guess who doesn't know the first thing about brainwashing."