Workplace Injuries Comic Strips - Page 2

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42 Results for Workplace Injuries

View 11 - 20 results for workplace injuries comic strips. Discover the best "Workplace Injuries" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hapy, #spacious offcie, #ocean view, #workplace, #personalized environemnt, #brad pitt

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"Who's today's guest cartoonist?" Dilbert: "I'm so happy in my new spacious office with an ocean view." "Finally I have the workplace I've always dreamed of." Wally: "The personalized environment headset works, sir." The boss: "Brad Pitt! Shouldn't you put a shirt on?" ANSER: GO TO DILBERT.COM

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stalking new hire, #date tomorrow, #employee orientation, #workplace hazards

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Alice: hows your stalking of the new hire going? Wally: we have a date for tomorrow. Alice: She's in an employee orientation meeting today. wally: Uh - oh. Module four is about identifying workplace hazards.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #human resources, #change name, #workplace, #evil enough, #evil laugh, #business

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Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I might change my department's name." "To "Workplace Services." BU-WHA-HA-HA-HA!!" "When things don't sound evil enough on their own, I like to toss in a bu-wha-ha-ha-ha."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pension fund, #solevent, #workplace safety, #ceo, #smoking is cool

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"Management is pleased to announce that it has a plan to make your pension fun solvent." "In unrelated news, the guidelines for workplace safety have been relaxed." "Our CEO reminds you that smoking is cool."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office buildings, #cubicle workplace, #open floor plan, #research, #pattern, #randomize evil, #science

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Boss: We're thinking of moving from a cubicle workplace to an open floor plan. Dilbert: Is that because you did some research that discovered that the open floor plan is the only thing worse than what we have now? Boss: They figured out the pattern. Catbert: I told you we should randomize our evil!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #happiness, #work ethic, #workplace happiness, #direct deposit, #mental distance, #effort, #paycheck, #no clear goal, #doing good work, #job satisafaction, #stress related problems, #highly demotivated, #psychology

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Asok: Wally, what is the key to workplace happiness? Wally: Well, Asok, it all starts with direct deposit. You want to keep some mental distance between your effort and your paycheck. Next, you want to work on projects that have no clear goals or deadlines. Coworker: Hey, Wally, can you... Wally: No, I'm too busy doing various things. Asok: What about the satisfaction of doing good work? Wally: Job satisfaction is what people feel right before they die from stress-related problems. Asok: I feel highly demotivated right now. Wally: You are very welcome.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #workplace rumours, #idiot, #false rumor, #charging for rumors

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Dogbert's Rumor Control Ted says, "I need to squash a workplace rumor that I'm an idiot." Dogbert says, "I charge $10 for each false rumor and $1,000 for any rumor I decide is true." Ted says, "Sounds fair." Dogbert says, "Really? That just cost you $1,000."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angry, #annoyed, #complain, #feng shui, #lobby, #mirror, #workplace energy, #desk, #angle, #give the finger, #flip the bird, #chi

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Wally says, "Who's the idiot that put a mirror in the lobby? That's bad Feng Shui." Wally says, "I keep trying to work, but all of our workplace energy is getting reflected right back out to the sidewalk." Wally says, "And the way your desk is angled is totally flipping me the chi bird!"

Work Is Dehumanizing

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Work Is Dehumanizing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #man, #workplace, #dehumanizing, #Environment, #dignity, #name

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Man: This workplace is dehumanizing! I can no longer work in this environment! I refuse to allow any more assaults on my dignity. I quit! The Boss: And your name is...?

Workplace Bully

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Workplace Bully - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #bully, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #threat, #work

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Boss: Cheryl, the other employees are complaining that you're a workplace bully. Cheryl: Hand over your wallet or else I'll tell your boss you tried to give me a shoulder rub. Carol: Did you talk to her? Boss: Don't ever ask me to do anything for your again.