985 Water Comic Strips - Page 2

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99 Results for 985 Water

View 11 - 20 results for 985 water comic strips. Discover the best "985 Water" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #mineral spa, #evil, #capitalism, #scams, #hose, #water

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A man stands outside Dilbert's house and says to Dogbert, "Goodbye . . . I think your 'New Age Mineral Water Spa' has been a complete rip-off!" Dogbert turns on a hose and says, "I'm sorry you feel that way . . . Here's a free gallon of miracle hose water." Dilbert says, "You're an evil little dog." Dogbert points the hose at Dilbert and asks, "Thirsty?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 1992's comic on:


Tags #sitting, #Dilbert, #north, #equator, #water, #swirls, #clockwise, #drain, #south, #counter clockwise, #juan, #Dogbert

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "When you're north of the equator, water swirls clockwise down the drain . . ." Dilbert continues, "South of the equator, it swirls counter-clockwise." Dogbert asks, "What's it do right on the equator?" On the equator, a woman stands in front of a sink and says, "Juan! It's just sitting there again!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 15, 1992's comic on:


Tags #robot, #heart, #attacks, #eating, #cows, #california, #drought, #fault, #water, #subsidies, #global warming, #earth, #organized

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Dogbert and a robot sit outdoors. The robot says, "I worry . . . Is it my fault that people get heart attacks?" Dogbert replies, "No . . . That's from eating too many cows." The robot asks, "Is the California drought my fault?" Dogbert answers, "No . . . That's from water subsidies to cows." The robot asks, "Global warming?" Dogbert replies, "Cows again." The robot asks, "Cows are destroying the earth?" Dogbert says, "They're better organized than you'd think."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #common sense, #school, #water, #boot, #heel, #betty, #liquid, #hair, #partial, #credit

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Dogbert asks, "Who can show me how to get the water out of this boot?" Dogbert hands the boot to a woman and says, "If you have trouble, the directions are written on the heel." As the woman puts her head into the boot, Dogbert says, "I'm sorry, Betty. I can only give you partial credit for trying to absorb the liquid with your hair."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #special, #washing, #instructions, #fold, #garment, #star, #cotton, #swathes, #launder, #glacier, #water, #detergent, #glandular, #australian, #nik-nik, #bug, #alive, #delicate, #quick

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Dilbert carries a load of dirty clothes to the washing machine. Dilbert looks at the label on a shirt collar. He reads, "Special washing instructions." Dilbert reads, "Fold the garment in a five-point star and wrap in cotton swathes . . ." Dilbert reads, "Launder only in pure glacier water heated to 98 degrees . . ." Dilbert reads, "For detergent, use only the glandular secretion of the Australian nik-nik bug . . ." Dilbert reads, "In fact, I'm so delicate that you're hurting me right now. Ouch! Ouch! Let me go! Help!" Dilbert stuffs the shirt into the machine." Dilbert says, "The best I can do is to make it quick." A scream comes from the machine.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #women and men, #dating, #relationships, #prices, #feelings, #emotions

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Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I like a man who isn't afraid to cry." Dilbert puts his head on the table and sobs, "Waah! Waah! The prices here are so high! Waah! Waah!" Dilbert thinks, "It's not working. She tricked me." The woman looks at the menu and says, "I'll just have water, I think."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 11, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #kitchen

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Dilbert walks through the house wearing an apron and thinking, "The water for my spaghetti should be boiling by now." Ratbert stands in the pot of water on the stove. Ratbert says to Dilbert, "Oops! You caught me. I usually finish hot tubbing before you get back." Dogbert sits on the hassock and Dilbert sits on the floor leaning against the hassock. Dogbert says, "It raises a big question mark about the capers." Dilbert asks, "Capers?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 27, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #physical, #manifestatioin, #ego, #worship, #female, #sparkling water

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Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert and this is the physical manifestation of my ego. Dilbert's Ego: Worship me, female!! Dilbert: That's why I only feed it sparkling water.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 1994's comic on:


Tags #ratio, #liquidity to stupidity, #reincarnation fund, #985 water, #cheap suit, #amazing brain

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Dogbert: Good news - your ratio of liquidity is very low. You qualify to invest in my reincarnation fund. Man: If my ratio is low, that means IM ...uh... Made of liquid. Dogbert: Id say you're 98% water, 2% cheap suit, and whats left is your amazing brain.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 1994's comic on:


Tags #potluck lunch, #bring bags, #salt, #ice, #beverage, #mineral water

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Alice: We've reached a new low in the 'potluck lunch' sign-up. Twelve people signed up to bring bags of ice and one person is bringing slat. I need one of you at least bring a beverage. Wally: Put me down for one bag of sparkling mineral water.