Ever Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

349 Results for Ever

View 11 - 20 results for ever comic strips. Discover the best "Ever" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #strange, #post office, #wall, #stick, #tongue

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert asks, "Do you ever feel like doing something really strange?" Dogbert continues, "Sometimes I get the urge to break into the post office at night and lick all the stamps." Dilbert says, "Well . . . That's not TOO strange." Dogbert continues, "Then I would see how long I can stick to the wall by my tongue."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #substitute teacher, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #powerless, #marble, #statue, #bad, #biggest, #flock, #pigeons, #animals, #animal behavior

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks Dogbert, "How was your first day as a substitute school teacher?" Dogbert replies, "Imagine feeling completely powerless . . . Like a marble statue . . ." Dilbert says, "Gosh . . . That sounds pretty bad." Dogbert says, "Now imagine the biggest flock of pigeons you ever saw . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #bob, #fridge, #ice cream, #ice age, #guard

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ice cream. Bob: Sorry. I've been really jumpy ever since the ice age caught me off guard.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #brains, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #neighbors, #outiside, #talking, #tapioca, #vernon, #walking, #walks

View Transcript

Transcript

Vernon: Yo! Dilbert and Dogbert! Dilbert: Oh, no.... Dogbert: Yo. Vernon: Did I ever tell you about my favorite episode of, "Kojak?" Dogbert: Whoa! Vern, we gotta go before you turn our brains into tapioca! Dilbert: There's always the direct method.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #blind date, #biggest, #woman, #chance, #financially, #surviving, #dinner, #eat, #starch, #pasta, #banned, #life

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dilbert greets his blind date." Dilbert thinks, "This is the biggest woman I've ever seen." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Hi." Dilbert thinks, "I have only one chance of financially surviving dinner." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert says, "Say . . . Why don't we go to the 'All-you-can-eat House of Starch and Pasta?'" The woman replies, "Can't . . . Banned for life."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad habits, #parallel, #universe, #sea bass, #section, #habit

View Transcript

Transcript

The panel says, "Dilbert presents: Bad Habits From a Parallel Universe!" A maitre d' says to Dilbert and Dogbert, "Table for Phleem?" Dilbert replies, "Yes. In the 'no slapping yourself with a sea bass' section." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table listening to slapping noises. Dogbert says, "Great, one table away . . ." Dilbert says, "Do you ever wonder about the first person to try that habit?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #dinosaurs, #dawn, #bob, #mesmerized, #oratorical, #skill, #evil, #cult

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob the Dinosaur asks Dawn, "How did we ever allow ourselves to be drawn into Dogbert's evil cult?" Bob continues, "Maybe he has strange hypnotic powers. Maybe we were mesmerized by his oratorical skill." Dilbert says, "It says here you have brains the size of a walnut." Bob asks, "What's your point?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #police officer, #doctor fishlips, #alien, #escaped, #convict, #operation, #surgery

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor Fishlips: A patient from the prison disappeared after your appendectomy. Police Officer: "Tiny tom," is a master of escape. We think he crawled into your torso during the operation. Dilbert: That's stupid. How would he get out? Police Officer: Ever see the movie, "Alien"?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #doctor, #doctor fishlips, #police, #escaped convict, #tramp, #nurse, #appendix, #Comic, #comedy, #operation

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: There he is... Tiny Tom the convict is clinging to this man's pancreas. Note: Sometimes it is necessary to suspend disbelief for the purpose of creating comic situations. Parents should explain to their children that convicts will rarely, if ever, cling to another person's pancreas. Doctor Fishlips: Ho ho, it appears we have also located our own nurse Woodmeyer the tramp!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #armchair, #foot, #time, #reach, #outlet, #cord, #hose, #grandfather, #invented, #clean

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert struggles with a vacuum cleaner. He thinks, "What idiot invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert thinks, "I can only do about a foot at a time . . ." Dogbert pushes the vacuum cleaner and thinks, "Then I have to push this thing another foot." Dogbert turns to the reader and says, "Notice the tiny wheels which are designed to roll on any surface except carpet." Dogbert holds the electrical plug and thinks, "Now I can't reach the outlet." Dogbert thinks, "Then I get hopelessly tangled in the cord and hose." Dilbert enters the room and says, "Hi, Dogbert. Did I ever tell you that my grandfater invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert says, "Come closer." Dogbert uses the vacuum cleaner to suck Dilbert's clothes off his body. Dilbert is left wearing only his underwear. Dilbert says, "That's probably why I never mentioned it."