Hear Employees Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

830 Results for Hear Employees

View 11 - 20 results for hear employees comic strips. Discover the best "Hear Employees" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #orange, #leaves, #Dogbert, #los angeles, #summer, #scream, #die, #traffic, #hear

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert reads a travel magazine and says to Dogbert, "This year we should vacation where the leaves turn orange and fall off." Dogbert asks, "Los Angeles in the summer?" Dilbert replies, "No . . . Someplace where they don't scream before they die." Dogbert says, "You can't hear them over the traffic."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #doctor, #treament, #unconventional, #demon, #gaath, #tried, #before

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits on an examining table. A man with a stethoscope says, "I'd like to try a treatment which may seem unconventional." The man waves his arms and shouts, "Oh hear me, Omdahr, Demon of Gaath, heal this man's arm!!" Dilbert asks, "Has that ever worked?" The man replies, "Beats me. I've never tried it before." A demon's hand reaches toward the man's head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #self, #service, #gas, #station, #attendant, #military, #benefits, #Women, #forms

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Day one: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." A student raises his hand and says, "Question." The man asks, "Do service station employees qualify for military benefits?" Dogbert replies, "I don't think so." The man asks, "Can we fool women with these uniforms?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #consulting, #job, #questioning, #employees, #underpaid, #problems, #fault, #lard, #head

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and the Boss walk out of the Boss's office. Dogbert says, "My fee for business consulting is $200 an hour." The Boss says, "Fair enough." Dogbert says, "I'll spend the day questioning your employees to identify problem areas." Later that day, Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk. Dogbert reads a document and says, "It's unanimous. They're underpaid and all the problems are your fault, 'Lard Head.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #floyed remora, #twenty years, #survives, #attaching, #employees

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Dilbert, this is your new co-worker, Floyd Remora. Floyd has worked here for twenty years without developing any skills. He survives by attaching himself to other employees. Dilbert: Go ahead... Ask me how my day went.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #presentation, #big, #boss, #topic, #geometry, #major, #work, #somehow, #hour, #rectangles

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, put together a presentation for the Big Boss's staff meeting." Dilbert asks, "On what topic?" The Boss replies, "I hear the Big Boss was a geometry major, so let's work that in somehow." The Boss asks, "Can you do an hour on the many uses of rectangles?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #staff, #meeting, #geometry, #rectangles, #misunderstood, #parallelograms, #controversy, #communication

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert says as he looks through some transparencies, "I'm putting together a presentation for the Big Boss's staff meeting. We hear he likes geometry." Dogbert reads a transparency that says, "Rectangles: the misunderstood parallelograms." Dogbert says, "It's bound to spark controversy." Dilbert says, "We believe in open communication."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #japanese, #offer, #company, #ceo, #employees, #laid off, #accept, #neener, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

A man stands in front of Dilbert's desk and says, "The Japanese have made an offer to buy the company." The man continues, "As CEO you would make $68 million . . . But the employees would all be laid off." Back at home, Dilbert asks Dogbert, "If I accept, what will I say to the employees?" Dogbert replies, "How about 'neener neener?'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #alice, #staff, #cuts, #dart, #chart, #blind folded, #slayed, #johnson, #decisive, #management

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert and two other employees, "The staff cuts will be determined by tossing a dart at the organization chart while blindfolded." The Boss puts on a blindfold and throws the dart. Someone screams. A woman says, "You slayed Johnson!" The Boss replies, "Boy, talk about decisive management!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #alice, #laid off, #bruce, #calculated, #friends, #pay cuts, #company, #gosh, #office, #furniture

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Alice stand behind a man's desk. Wally says, "We're sorry to hear you're getting laid off, Bruce." Wally continues, "We calculated that if ten of your friends here took ten percent pay cuts then the company can keep you." Bruce says excitedly, "Gosh! You'd do that for me?" Wally replies, "No. We're here to look at your office furniture."