Knowledge Comic Strips - Page 2
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128 Results for Knowledge
View 11 - 20 results for knowledge comic strips. Discover the best "Knowledge" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday March 25,
1993
Tags Dilbert, the boss, deserve, promoted, technical, unstable, potentially, dangerous, knowledge
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "I'll prove I deserve to be promoted to 'Technical Prima Donna.'" Dilbert sprays the Boss with a fire extinguisher and says, "I think this shows that I'm emotionally unstable and potentially dangerous." Dilbert asks, "How was that?" The Boss says from under a pile of foam, "It was good. I'm starting to over-value your technical knowledge already."
Saturday May 21,
1994
Tags change project, actual knowledge, changes, voicemail
Transcript
The Boss: "We just had a meeting and decided to change your project substantially." "We didn't invite you to the meeting because things go smoother when nobody has any actual knowledge." Dilbert: "So, what are the changes?" The Boss: "If I remember, I'll leave you a voice mail."
Tuesday August 30,
1994
Tags classes, get mba, big name school, knowledge, not prestige, tonys, house, mbas, babe ratio
Transcript
"I'm going to take classes at night and get an MBA." "I don't need a big-name school. I'm in this for knowledge, not prestige." "How about 'Tony's House of MBA's'?" "The babe ratio is better at 'MBA-O-RAMA'."
Friday September 02,
1994
Tags classes at night, eleven cheerios, gaining knowledge, knowledge, work all day
Transcript
"I don't know how you do it. You work all day and now you take classes at night." "ZZZ" "It's hard, but you're gaining knowledge that couldn't be obtained any other way." "Whump" "Hey! I can hold eleven 'cheerios' in my nose!" "And it's knowledge you can apply."
Sunday November 13,
1994
Tags promote district manager, technical knowledge, valuable, no promotions, promote al, no knowledge al, grumpy
Transcript
The Boss stands in front of Alice, Dilbert and Al. He says, "I need to promote one of you to the district manager position." Dilbert, Al and Alice look at the Boss. The Boss says, "Dilbert, your technical knowledge is too valuable to lose." The Boss continues, "Ditto for Alice. Neither of you can be promoted." Dilbert and Alice look angry. The Boss says, "The only logical choice is to promote Al because he has no valuable knowledge." Dilbert replies, "Al??! A director??! He doesn't know what day of the week it is!! The Boss tells Al, "They're just grumpy because it's Monday." Dilbert says, "It's Thursday."
Friday January 20,
1995
Tags dark side, engineering, technical knowledge, generlaist, easy path, suite, applications, unnatural
Transcript
Phil stands behind Dilbert's desk and waves his hand and his spoon. Phil says, "Come to the dark side, Dilbert. Renounce engineering and become a manager." Dilbert says angrily, "NEVER!" Looking over Dilbert's shoulder, Phil says, "Your technical knowledge is getting stale. You're becoming a generalist . . . take the easy path." Phil is holding a set of software boxes. He says to Dilbert, "I brought you a suite of applications that ll work together." Dilbert yells, "THAT'S UNNATURAL!!! BE GONE!!!"
Sunday February 04,
1996
Tags never undertsnd, engineer, all day meetings, knowledge worker, prodcut, acronym, puntucal, dilbert's mother, engineering
Transcript
Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dilbert's mother offers him a cookie and says, "I'll never understand what you do for a living." Dilbert replies, "I told you I'm an engineer, Mom." Dilbert's mom says, "So you say, but you also say you spend all day in meetings. When do you do any engineering?" Dilbert replies, "Good point. Let's just say I'm what the experts call a 'knowledge worker.'" Dilbert's mother asks, "Which experts call it that?" Dilbert replies, "I don't know." Dilbert's mom asks, "What's the name of the product you're working on?" Dilbert responds, "I don't know what the acronym stands for . . ." Mom asks, "What kind of market penetration and return on investment do you expect?" Dilbert says, "Um . . . I don't know . . ." Dilbert's mom says, "Oh, dear . . . Well, I'm sure you're very punctual." Dilbert shouts, "Ask me another question!! C'mon . . ." Dogbert asks, "Why do they call you a 'KNOWLEDGE worker'?"
Saturday June 14,
1997
Tags Advice, clone boss, email message, no knowledge, perspective, possible, no experience
Transcript
Dilbert tells Wally, "Someday it will be possible to clone or boss." Wally replies, "But the clone would have no experience and no knowledge." The Boss tells them, "I just sent an e-mail message to Japan. I don't know the language so I took your advice and typed it all in caps." Dilbert says, "Wow. That put it all in perspective."
Thursday August 21,
1997
Tags recruiting on campus, judging me, job interview, engineering knowledge, ancient, confidence, people skills
Transcript
Caption: Recruiting on Campus. The nerdy college studnet says, "It's funny that you're judgein me. My engineering knowledge is current while yours is ancient." Dilbert writes on a note pad. The nerd thinks, "I think I impressed him with my confidence." Dilbert writes. The nerd hits himself in the head. "Ooh! People skills! I forgot!" Dilbert writes.
Sunday November 02,
1997
Tags marketing dept, engineering dept, other engineers, careless mistake, need nets, rope, tranquilizer darts, askengineering
Transcript
Marketing Department: A guy walks by a table and says, "Hey! It's a magazine!" He reaches for it. Engineering Department: A loud speaker says, "Danger! A magazine has been discovered in marketing!" Alice looks scared. Alice pokes her head into Dilbert cubicle and says, "Marketing has a magazine!" Dilbert gasps and his hair stands on end. Dilbert heads for the War Room. He says, "Gather the other engineers. We must get that magazine." Alice says, "Check." Dilbert says to Alice, Asok and Wally, "We think is was a careless mistake by someone in the mail department." Dilbert says, "As you know, there is nothing more dangerous than a marketing person with a little bit of knowledge." Dilbert points to a diagram on the dry-erase board. He says, "We know where the magazine will be read. We need nets, rope and traquilizer darts." The marketing guy starts to enter the men's restroom as a darts flies towards his neck. He thinks, "I'll have to ask engineering to build one of these space staions..."

