Life In One Package Comic Strips - Page 2
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1000 Results for Life In One Package
View 11 - 20 results for life in one package comic strips. Discover the best "Life In One Package" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday June 08,
1989
Friday June 09,
1989
Tags #crimes, #letter, #mail, #illegal
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I got a chain letter." Dogbert says, "Those are illegal." Dilbert says, "I've never broken a law in my whole life, but I'm tempted to try this." Dogbert says, "One suggestion." Dogbert continues, "Maybe for your first crime you shouldn't put your name and address on it and distribute it to ten thousand strangers."
Saturday June 10,
1989
Tags #invention, #revolution
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Take a look at my new invention: the 'Dick Tracy' watch!" Dogbert says, "Wow! A watch that transmits voices and pictures could revolutionize life on this planet!" Dilbert looks at his watch and says, "Gee, that sounds a lot harder than my idea of gluing a little picture of Dick Tracy on each watch."
Monday June 12,
1989
Tags #death, #marriage, #relationships, #medical
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert reads a magazine and says, "Wow! This survey says that a woman over 35 has the same odds of getting married as being killed by a terrorist." Dogbert asks, "Of the ones who do get married, how many marry terrorists?" Dilbert replies, "One in four." Dogbert says, "Gosh."
Thursday June 22,
1989
Tags #dog, #dreaming, #flying, #animals
Transcript
In his dream, Dilbert floats in mid air. Dilbert thinks, "Ooh boy! Looks like another one of those flying dreams I keep having." Dilbert flies through the air thinking, "This is great! I just hope I don't crash and wake up this time." Dilbert is suspended over his bed on a pulley system. Dogbert holds the rope and says, "Houston, we are experiencing difficulty."
Saturday June 24,
1989
Transcript
The caption says, "Dogbert demonstrates the art of puns. Step #1: 'The Set-up.'" Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Tell me again about your uncle the famous biologist." Dilbert says, "Uncle Albert won many awards for his work in breeding sea anemonies. Sadly, he had little time for a social life." The caption says, "Step #2: 'The Delivery' (from outside of swatting range)." Dogbert stands in the doorway and says, "With anemonies like that, who needs friends?"
Sunday July 02,
1989
Tags #letter, #phone call, #prison, #postage
Transcript
The telephone rings. Dilbert picks up the phone and says, "Hello." The voice on the other end says, "This is the governor . . ." The governor says, "Do you remember that snotty letter you wrote about prison overcrowding? We thought YOU might want to look after one of our guys for thiry or forty years." The doorbell rings. A large man in a prison uniform says, "Hi. I'm Bob. My friends would call me 'Strangler' if they were alive." Bob carries a suitcase into the house and asks, "So, where do you keep the blunt objects? Sure is crowded in here." Dilbert clenches his fist and says, "Ooh! I am so tempted to fire off another letter over this!!" Dogbert says, "Yeah! 'Postage due' this time!"
Monday July 03,
1989
Tags #crimes, #watch, #neighborhood, #leader
Transcript
Dogbert and Dilbert stand in the yard. Dilbert, who is wearing a sash and carrying a flashlight, asks, "Are you sure you don't want to join the neighborhood watch group?" Dogbert says, "This is ridiculous. You all know that every single crime in this neighborhood was committed by one guy: Bad Ed." Dilbert says, "We can't actually prove that." Dogbert says, "I'm just saying maybe you shouldn't have elected him group leader."
Wednesday July 05,
1989
Tags #cross word, #challenge
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table playing Scrabble. As Dogbert arranges his letters on the game board, Dilbert asks, "What the heck is 'jequirity?'" Dogbert replies, "You know - the poisonous, red and black seed of the Indian Licorice plant. Want to challenge?" Dilbert replies, "No. At least this one has vowels." Dogbert says, "That's 704 for me."
Sunday July 09,
1989
Tags #aliens, #secret, #selfish
Transcript
Two aliens who look like cows travel toward earth in a spaceship. Dilbert sits at his desk. The doorbell rings. Dogbert says, "I'll get the door." Dogbert opens the door and sees the two aliens. One of the aliens says, "Greetings, earthling. We are an advanced race from the planet Moothron." The alien continues, "We came to share our secrets for ending hunger, poverty and disease." Dogbert asks, "What's in it for me?" The aliens look at each other. The aliens get in their spaceship and fly away. Dogbert sits on the hassock and says, "I'll always wonder if there was a better way to handle that."