Search Results for "low self esteem"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #aspiring, #gas, #station, #transferred, #career, #congress, #fotomat

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands in front of several men and says, "Welcome to Dogbert's School for aspiring Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." Dogbert continues, "I will teach you how to sit in a little building and do nothing." Dogbert continues, "These same skills can be transferred to a career in Congress or Fotomat." A student says, "Really? Fotomat?!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #self, #service, #curve, #pumps, #figure

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands in front of several men and says, "Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants will not be easy." Dogbert says, "Phillips! What would you do if a customer couldn't figure out how to use the pumps?" Phillips answers, "Nothing. It's self-service." The man sitting next to him thinks, "Great . . . there goes the curve."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #self, #service, #gas, #station, #attendant, #military, #benefits, #Women, #forms

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Day one: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." A student raises his hand and says, "Question." The man asks, "Do service station employees qualify for military benefits?" Dogbert replies, "I don't think so." The man asks, "Can we fool women with these uniforms?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #chool, #self-service, #gas, #station, #attendants, #thoughts, #minds, #easy

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Second day: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." Dogbert says, "You must learn to relax . . ." Dogbert continues, "I want you to clear your minds of all thoughts." The three students sit limply in their chairs with blank looks on their faces. Dogbert thinks, "That was too easy."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 09, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #school, #self-service, #gas, #station, #attendants, #teaching, #section, #refolding, #maps, #frustrating, #paper cuts, #minor, #panic, #sweat the room

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk and says to Dogbert, "I heard you closed your school for self-service gas station attendants." Dogbert says, "It didn't work out." Dogbert continues, "I was teaching the section on refolding maps . . . Frustrations were high . . . At first, the paper cuts were minor, but panic swept the room." Dilbert asks, "Well, how bad could . . ." Dogbert says, "They're all dead . . ."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #shredder, #door, #self deprication, #hatred, #insecurities

View Transcript

Transcript

Carrying a stack of paper, Dilbert approaches a door marked "Shredder." The sound, "Bzzzzzzpp . . ." comes from inside the shredder room. Dilbert exits the shredder room. His hair, tie and shirt have been shredded. Dilbert thinks, "I hate being me."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #cop, #under, #arrest, #killing, #senior, #executive, #ear, #corn, #self-defense

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert opens the door. A police officer points a gun at him and says, "You're under arrest for killing a senior executive of your company with an ear of corn." As the officer frisks him, beads of sweat fly off Dilbert's head and he cries, "It . . . It was self-defense! HE started the food fight! I had just seasoned my corn . . . It was in my hand . . . It was just a reflex!!" The officer says, "The charge is 'a salt and buttering with intent to kill.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 27, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #woman, #self deprication, #utter, #turn, #silly, #hard

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks down the office hallway and thinks, "Forgot my keys." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to slap my forehead and mutter when I turn around, otherwise I'll look silly." As two people watch, Dilbert smacks himself and his glasses fly off his head. Dilbert thinks, "Too hard."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #bad, #mood, #trip, #ugly, #stranger, #technique, #wont, #self-help, #book

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert walks on a sidewalk thinking, "I'm in such a bad mood. I've got to trip an ugly stranger. That will cheer me up." Dogbert trips a man and the man's glasses fly off his face as he falls. Dogbert walks away thinking, "That's a technique you won't find in any self-help book."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 21, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #profits, #low, #training, #class, #cute, #jumpy

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, profits are too low. I've got to let you go . . ." Dilbert says, "What!!" The Boss continues, ". . . To a training class." The Boss walks away thinking, "They're so cute when they get jumpy."