Raise Hand Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

511 Results for Raise Hand

View 11 - 20 results for raise hand comic strips. Discover the best "Raise Hand" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags shirt, head, Dogbert, Dilbert, Family, portrait, torso

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, who has no head, walks up to Dogbert and asks, "Dogbert, could you give me a hand?" Dogbert says, "Paw." Dilbert points to his missing head and explains, "I pulled a loose thread on my shirt and my head got sucked into my torso." Dilbert asks, "What should we do?" Dogbert replies, "This might be a good time for a family portrait."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, boss, job, sez, raise, bench, outside, project, stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert and a man sit on a park bench. The man says, ". . . So then I sez to my boss, 'You can just stuff this stupid project . . .'" The man continues, "Then I sez, 'Let's see YOU do this job.' And I sez, 'I should get a raise.' I gotta go." Dogbert says, "The more they sez 'I sez,' the less likely it is they really said what they sez they said."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, dilbert's, invention, blow, empty, mail, truck, sneezing, stranger

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands outside the post office truck yard holding the Sonic Obliterator. Dogbert says, "On one hand, I know it's wrong to use Dilbert's invention to blow up these empty mail trucks." Dogbert says, "On the other paw, this is gonna be more fun than sneezing on strangers." Dogbert continues, "It's a moral dilemma . . . But I like to think that difficult choices like this build character." Dogbert presses the trigger.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, mineral, water, spa, atlantis, donut, shop, customer, cash

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits behind a cash register and says to a customer, "Welcome to Dogbert's New Age Mineral Water Spa . . . Hand over the cash." Dogbert says, "Hold it . . . The vibes from my crystal tell me we knew each other in a previous life . . . In ATLANTIS!" A man says, "That's what you told the last guy, too." Dogbert replies, "Atlantis was a small town. I ran the only donut shop."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags judicial proceedings, Dilbert, Dogbert, lawyer, jury duty, kill, axe, civic duty

View Transcript

Transcript

The defense lawyer says to the jury, "My client has been accused of the most heinous crimes." The attorney points to a man holding an ax and wearing an executioner's hat. The attorney asks, "But does this look like a person who could kill??" Dogbert, who is sitting next to Dilbert, raises his hand and says, "Ooh! Ooh! I know this one!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, bank, ethel, hand, combat, serious, automated, teller, machine, encouraging

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at a teller window at the Bank of Ethel. The teller says, "I cannot allow this withdrawal . . ." The woman continues, "Unless you defeat me in hand to hand combat." Dilbert arrives at home with a bandage on his head and his arm in a sling. Dilbert tells Dogbert, "They seem pretty serious about encouraging the use of their automated teller machines."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, doctor, treament, unconventional, demon, gaath, tried, before

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits on an examining table. A man with a stethoscope says, "I'd like to try a treatment which may seem unconventional." The man waves his arms and shouts, "Oh hear me, Omdahr, Demon of Gaath, heal this man's arm!!" Dilbert asks, "Has that ever worked?" The man replies, "Beats me. I've never tried it before." A demon's hand reaches toward the man's head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, self, service, gas, station, attendant, military, benefits, Women, forms

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Day one: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." A student raises his hand and says, "Question." The man asks, "Do service station employees qualify for military benefits?" Dogbert replies, "I don't think so." The man asks, "Can we fool women with these uniforms?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, handpainted, came, concept, sticking, peoples, noses, money, leave, world

View Transcript

Transcript

A man stands next to a cart with a sign that says, "Nose Puppies $1.00." The man says to Dilbert, "I make them myself. Each one is hand-painted." The man continues, "They weren't selling until I came up with the concept of sticking them up people's noses." The man continues, "I'm not in it for the money. I just want to leave this world a little better than I found it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, awkward, parties, d'oeuvres, included, working, losers, living, idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands by himself with a cocktail glass in his hand. He thinks, "I feel so awkward at these office parties . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I've already walked back and forth to the hors d'oeuvres six times." Dilbert thinks, "I'll stand close to these two and hope they include me." The man and woman turn their backs to Dilbert. He thinks, "It's not working." Dilbert thinks, "I'll have to find somebody who is alone." Dilbert thinks, "Hmm . . . All the people standing alone look like losers." Dilbert thinks, "I'll just say something . . . What have I got to lose?" He says to the Boss, "Hi." Dilbert says, "I'm Dilbert. Waht do you do for a living?" The Boss replies, "I'm your boss, idiot."