Soul Sponge Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

90 Results for Soul Sponge

View 11 - 20 results for soul sponge comic strips. Discover the best "Soul Sponge" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 1996's comic on:


Tags #manager ted, #planned better, #pushed down stairs, #soul left body, #evil entity, #performance reviews

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss pokes his head into Ted's office and asks, "How do you like being a manager, Ted?" Ted replies, "Yesterday my staff pushed me down ten flights of stairs. My soul left my body and now I'm a lifeless evil entity." The Boss says, "Just in time to do performance reviews!" Ted responds, "I couldn't have planned it better."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1996's comic on:


Tags #executive review board, #popcorn for soul, #prepare presentation, #smell, #meeting canceled

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss peers into Dilbert's cubicle and says, "I want everyone to prepare a presentation for the executive review board. Urgent." Dilbert makes sniffing noises and says, "What's that smell? Yes!!! . . . It's the scent of unnecessary work for a meeting that will be canceled." Wally peers over the cubicle wall and says to Dilbert, "Did you smell the unnecessary work? We can ignore it!" Dilbert replies, "It's like popcorn for the soul." Alice sits in her cubicle thinking, "Urgent."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 1996's comic on:


Tags #ivy league degree, #vice president, #rerganized, #training ratbert, #teching, #grooming for position, #powerful position

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk and Dogbert sits on the desk behind him. Dilbert says, "I wish I had an Ivy League degree so I could be promoted to vice president." Dogbert responds, "You don't need one." Dilbert says, "It's impossible to be a vice president without one." Dogbert says, "I'll bet $100 I can turn a rat into a vice president." Dogbert and Ratbert stand in front of a mirror. Dogbert says, "That was good, but try saying it as though your soul just abandoned your body." Ratbert says, "We've reorganized to focus on our core competency."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 1996's comic on:


Tags #dance, #Dogbert, #employees, #hired, #more creative, #poetry, #souls, #special blend, #spiritually fulfilled, #dog with hat, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert, who is wearing a wizard's hat, stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. Dogbert says, "I can make your employees more creative and spiritually fulfilled." Dogbert continues, "I use my special blend of poetry and dance to touch their souls." The Boss says, "Okay. You're hired." Dogbert stands on a desk and dances while Alice, Wally and Dilbert watch. Dogbert recites, "There once was a dog with a hat . . . Who got paid to dance like that . . ." Wally says, "Hey! My soul just healed!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 1996's comic on:


Tags #dances, #dancing dogs, #go wild, #healed, #healthy, #invoice, #poems, #primal screams, #tech me, #total well being

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert, who is wearing a wizard's hat, stands on the desk in Alice's cubicle. Dogbert asks, "Have my poems and dances healed your soul yet, Alice? The company cares about your total well being." Alice says, "Excuse me." Alice leans over the cubicle wall and shouts at the Boss, "We want more MONEY, not more dancing dogs!!! M-O-N-E-Y!! The Boss and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "So you're saying those primal screams are healthy? Can you teach me to do it?" Dogbert says, "Here's my invoice - go wild."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1996's comic on:


Tags #strategic allaince, #technical skill, #endless supply, #resistance is futile, #assimilated

View Transcript

Transcript

A man with a goatee and a woman with spiked hair who's wearing a tube top enter a room with Dilbert. The man says, "Our strategic alliance is working well. My company provides amazing technical skill and your company . . ." The man continues, ". . . Has a seemingly endless supply of three-ring binders." They sit at a conference table. Dilbert says, "Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated." The woman asks, "Is it true that if your name is written in a binder you lose your soul?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 1997's comic on:


Tags #career counseling, #job involving sin, #bingo field, #budget work, #no marketing, #no auditing, #no garnet manuafacturing

View Transcript

Transcript

Chil is consulting Dogbert about his career. He says, "I'd be good at any job involving sin." Phil says, "Perhaps something in the bingo field, or maybe budget work." Dogbert suggests, "How about marketing?" Phil frowns, "I have a soul. It's just a small one." Dogbert says, "Gotcha. No marketing... no auditing... no garment manufacturing..."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 1998's comic on:


Tags #underfunded porject, #resources, #intern, #sponge bath, #water fountain, #employees, #budget diffrences, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Rag Man thinks, "I hate being on an underfunded project." Alice walks by with some guy. Rag Man asks, "Can you spare some resources, lady? How about that intern? Are you using him?" Rag Man shows intern, "First you have to learn how to give yourself a sponge bath at the water fountain."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 05, 1999's comic on:


Tags #Opinion, #words in face, #pot over head, #wipe, #damp cloth

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "That's my opinion." Dilbert's words fly across the room towards the boss' teflon pan head. The words drip across the boss' head. The boss says, "Nie try, but I can wipe it off with a damp sponge!!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 2000's comic on:


Tags #learn new technology, #sales person, #everything he knows, #moist towelettes, #sponge bath

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to the Boss, "I need to take a class to learn the new technology." The Boss replies, "Our vendor's sales person will teach you everything he knows." The sales person begins explaining to Dilbert, who sits taking notes. "You only need 'three moist towelettes' to give yourself a sponge bath."