Word Invention Comic Strips - Page 2

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224 Results for Word Invention

View 11 - 20 results for word invention comic strips. Discover the best "Word Invention" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, calculate, bingo, barry manilow, carnegie hall, nbc, event, invention, burp

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My new invention can calculate the odds of any event." Dogbert asks, "What are the odds that I care?" Dilbert looks at the device he is holding and says, "Hmm . . . It says 'Same as the odds of being asked to burp the greatest hits of Barry Manilow at Carnegie Hall . . .'" Dilbert continues reading the display, "'. . . And having NBC buy the story rights and turn it into a docudrama.'" Dogbert says, "Bingo."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, neans, scrabble, n

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table playing Scrabble. Dogbert arranges his letters and says, "That spells 'neans.' Five points for me." Dilbert says, "'Neans' is NOT a word, Dogbert." Dogbert replies, "I know, but I need to get rid of some n's." Dilbert says, "The n's don't justify the 'neans.'" Dogbert says, "I just wanted to hear you say that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, invention, deodorant, sarcasm, bones, sweat

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Dilbert shows Dogbert a device that looks like a handle. He says, "This is my newest invention: the deodorant spray booster pack!" Dilbert explains, "You connect it to any can of deodorant to boost the rate of output." Dogbert asks, "Why?" Dilbert replies, "Why?! . . . Do you know how much time is wasted waiting for the spray to hit your armpit?" Dilbert activates the device and it blows him through the wall. Dilbert lies on his back in the backyard. He says, "As my best friend, I'm sure you can contain any sarcastic references to deodorant until my bones mend." Dogbert replies, "No sweat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, pillow, kitten, copyright infringement, Word

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Dogbert sits on a pillow listening to the radio. Dilbert says, "Dogbert, I'd like to have a word with you." Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert says, "The neighbor says you glued little suction cups on their new kitten and stuck him on their windshield." Dogbert asks, "What's the problem, some kind of copyright infringement?" Dilbert asks, "What's your second guess?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, security system, pool, catapult, invention, fate

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Dilbert taps on the doorstep with a spade. He tells Dogbert, "My new security system is now installed." Dogbert asks, "How's it work?" Dilbert explains, "I buried a giant spring under the welcome mat to catapult any undesirables into the Wilsey's pool three blocks from here." Dilbert continues, "You just tap that little button on the floor there . . ." The caption says, "Time stands still as Dogbert ponders the gift that fate has given him." Dogbert stares at the launch button while Dilbert stands on the welcome mat. Dogbert reaches for the button and says, "I'm pretty sure the look on his face will be worth whatever minor guilt I feel over this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, Dilbert, names, engineer, new, memory, word association

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The Boss: Dilbert, let me introduce you to our new engineer. Dilbert: I hate introductions. I always forget their names. Maybe I can use a word association memory trick. Dee Alamo: Hi, I'm Dee Alamo. Dilbert: Darn... Nothing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, invention, logical, creative, engineer

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Dilbert sits at a table examining a device. Dilbert says, "I'm afraid I'll never figure out how to make my invention work." Dogbert says, "You are too logical. Use the right side of your brain." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . Yes, I must call on my creative side . . ." Dilbert puts the gadget on the table, hangs his head and says, "Now it doesn't work AND I want to cry."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, straight, bad, grammar, intellectuals

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Dogbert asks Dilbert, "Let me get this straight . . . You say that BAD grammar can become GOOD grammar over time?" Dilbert replies, "Yes. If a bunch of intellectuals start using a word wrong, then it becomes proper in common usage." Dogbert says, "Grammar would be a lot less confusing if we had smarter intellectuals."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bob, bob's classy clothes, Dilbert, Dogbert, retail, salesman, shrink, washer

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Dilbert walks into "Bob's Classy Clothes." Dilbert wears a pair of huge pants. He asks the salesperson, ". . . And you're quite certain these will shrink to fit?" The salesman replies, "You have my word as a retail salesman." Dilbert walks out of the store with a shopping bag. Dilbert shows Dogbert the pants. Dogbert says, "You were taken." Dilbert replies, "No, they shrink in the wash." Dilbert stands in front of the washing machine. Dogbert asks, "Will they fit now?" Dilbert replies, "Like a glove . . ." Dilbert holds the shrunken pants on his hand. He thinks, "Like a glove with two fingers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, cult, connotation, morons, lives, armchair, bad things

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I think you've taken your cult idea too far." Dogbert sits in a chair with a crown on his head. Dogbert asks, "Who says it's a cult?" Dilbert replies, "YOU said it's a cult!" Dogbert says, "That word has a bad connotation." Dogbert says, "I prefer to think of it as a bunch of morons who have nothing better to do with their lives."