tina: every time i hear you disagreeing with the experts, i lose a little respect for you.
dilbert: are you saying you once had respect for me?
tina crying and yelling: stop being happy about my criticisms!
dilbert: why can't i enjoy the attention?
tina: i've been keeping a running list, and it seems that 100% of the things you told me this year have been false.
wally: and we both got paid, so what's your point?
tina: i...don't know how to process that.
wally: i'd tell you, but apparently you wouldn't believe me.
tina: i listen to actual scientists, and they say your idea will never work.
dilbert: if a chipmunk listens to scientists, should i trust the chipmunk to understand what he heard?
tina: i don't get your point.
dilbert: and yet you do understand science?
tina: i saw on the news that the government plans to round up all bald people and out them in camps.
wally: you should be embarrassed for believing a story so obviously false.
tina: they said you'd say that.
boss to tina: i'm planning to increase the budget for training by fifty percent next year.
tina to dilbert: he didn't say anything about the other budgets.
dilbert to wally: he didn't say anything about the budget for research and development.
wally to alice: sounds like he's phasing out research and development.
alice to asok: he wouldn't phase out research and development unless he knows the company is failing.
asok to carol: the company must be going bankrupt.
carol to boss: the company is bankrupt.
boss thinking: i guess i don't need to increase the training budget.
tina: i don't want to sit too near your 5G phone prototype. i worry that it will fry my eggs.
boss: don't be silly. this phone was extensively tested for safety by qualified experts.
boss to dogbert: i need you to test this 5G phone for safety.
dogbert at desk labeled "low-cost testing: it looks fine to me. i'll email you my bill.
dilbert and tine walking.
tina: you argue with everything because you just have to be right.
dilbert: how can you tell the difference between someone who "has to be right" versus someone who is right and you need therapy?
tina: you're doing it again.
dilbert: or am i?
Tina: i almost got some information from carl. i stalked him to his cubicle and penetrated his outer defense of rudeness. but i never broke through his mumble layer.
dilbert: wait until you get to his ignorance layer.
dilbert: why is your writing so angry?
tina: tech writers are underpaid, so all of our envy and contempt spill out on the page.
dilbert: maybe you tech writers should drink less coffee and exercise more.
tina: this is exactly why we hate everyone.
dilbert: where do you want to go to lunch?
tina: i want you to suggest a place so i can say yes but still make you feel bad about it.
dilbert: how about the thai place?
tina: pffft. sure. i'm not that hungry anyway.
