Bed Idea Comic Strips - Page 2

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386 Results for Bed Idea

View 11 - 20 results for bed idea comic strips. Discover the best "Bed Idea" comics from Dilbert.com.

Sarcasm Empty Vessel

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Sarcasm Empty Vessel - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2019's comic on:


Tags #jokes, #office workers, #sarcasm, #millennial, #smartphone

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Man: Wow, that's a great idea. Let's just do that! LOL! Dilbert: I've noticed that you are nothing but an empty vessel for transporting sarcasm. Man: Oooh! I'm such an empty vessel! LOL! Dilbert: I don't know what to do with all of this.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boredom, #panic, #technology, #smartphone, #thoughts

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Dilbert: I'm turning off my digital devices so I can spend some time with my thoughts. Dogbert: That sounds like a terrible idea. Do you remember what your quiet thoughts were like? Dilbert: Not really. But how bad could it be? This isn't so bad. Just a bit boring. Five minutes later. Dilbert: I'm getting the shakes. The boredom has metastasized. Gaaaa!!! The boredom is overwhelming! Kill me! Kill me! Dogbert: Maybe you should have tried being with people. Dilbert: It was already bad enough.

Jargon

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Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 2018's comic on:


Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

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Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.

Bitter Losers

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Bitter Losers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #idea, #lying, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #Promotion

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Boss: I'm promoting Ted for coming up with a genius idea to reduce our software expenses. Dilbert: That was actually my idea. All Ted did was tell you it was his idea. Boss: How do you put up with these bitter losers? Ted: The promotion helps.

Sabotage The Plan

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Sabotage The Plan  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #plan, #sabatoge, #incompetent

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Dilbert: We know our boss's plan is a bad idea, but it's our job to execute anyway. Wally: Maybe we should try to sabotage the plan by being incompetent. Dilbert: Since when do you need a reason to be incompetent? Wally: It's more of a "nice but not necessary" situation.

Bias For Action

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Bias For Action - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 04, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #waste, #time, #thought, #chairs, #meeting

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The Boss: We need to have a bias for action! Alice: Good idea. This meeting is a total waste of time. The Boss: I probably should have thought that through.

Criminal Does Tech Support

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Criminal Does Tech Support - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #market, #competitive, #career, #criminal, #internal, #tech support, #passwords, #software, #justice, #fist

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Dilbert: I know the job market is highly competitive, but was it really a good idea to hire a career criminal? The Boss: Relax. He's just doing internal tech support. Paul: I'll need all of your passwords to update your software. Alice: Have you met my fist of justice?

Virtual Reality

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Virtual Reality - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #days, #virtual, #trained, #hospital, #designer, #bed, #lazy

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Dilbert: After spending three great days in virtual reality, I accidentally trained myself to hate actual reality. Wally: What if this reality is actually another virtual reality, and you're really in a hospital bed somewhere? Dilbert: What kind of designer would make a reality with you in it? Wally: A lazy one.

Wally Has An Idea For Carol

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Wally Has An Idea For Carol - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #carol, #Wally, #bike, #compliment, #insults

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Wally: I have a great idea for you. Carol: Keep it to yourself. Your ideas are always insults masquerading as helpfulness. Wally: You seem cranky. Have you considered riding a bike to work? Carol: Die, monster!

Wally Has An Idea

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Wally Has An Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 20, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Wally, #alice, #Dilbert, #coffee, #work, #criteria, #criticism

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Wally: I have an idea on how to fix our process. Alice: I've noticed that all of your ideas make everyone but you work harder. Wally: Apparently, we have different criteria for what makes an idea great.