Blame Comic Strips - Page 2
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Character
118 Results for Blame
View 11 - 20 results for blame comic strips. Discover the best "Blame" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 14,
2019
Finding A Scapegoat
Tags business, office, project, ceo, scapegaot, climate change
Transcript
the boss: we'll need a scapegoat to blame for our failure on this project. dilbert: no one will believe it wasn't our fault. the boss: are you kidding? the boss: people will believe anything. the boss: we just have to be the first to frame the situation. dilbert: i suppose we could make our lie sound credible. the boss: that's overkill. dilbert: we don't need to sound credible? the boss: not even a little. the boss is in ceo's office. the boss: our project failed because of climate change. ceo: that sounds right.
Friday July 12,
2019
Unforseen Risks
Tags blame, boss, office, office workers, sarcasm, risks
Transcript
Boss: How can you be sure there are no unforeseen risks with this plan? Dilbert: It is not possible to know if one has considered every risk. Therefore, we can never be sure. Boss: So...I can still blame you for any problems that pop up? Dilbert: Yes, that part of the process is still intact.
Tuesday April 10,
2018
Dilbert Starts The Cover Up
Tags conspiracy, aspersions, suspicion, blame, proof, guilt, innocence
Transcript
Narrator: How conspiracy theories happen. Alice: I think Dilbert is trying to ruin my career. Carol said he was mad about something I said, and hew as in the server room right before I lost my files. This morning he said he "had work to do." Boss: OMG. He already started the cover-up. Narrator: Continued...
Monday April 09,
2018
How Conspiracy Theories Start
Tags conspiracy, aspersions, guilt, innocence, blame
Transcript
Narrator: How conspiracy theories start. Alice: I can't find my spreadsheet files. Asok: I saw Dilbert going into the server room. Alice: That doesn't mean any... Asok: Carol said he was mad about something you said. Narrator: Continued...
Saturday March 31,
2018
Anyone Fired Lately
Sunday March 11,
2018
Tags interview, hiring, honesty, immoral, ulterior motives
Transcript
Dilbert: What would you say are your biggest weaknesses? Man: I like to rifle through my coworkers' desks when they aren't looking. But I don't steal anything unless I know I can frame someone else for the crime. I leave for work an hour late every day and blame traffic. I avoid accomplishing goals so I won't feel like sellout. Sometimes I'll start a trash fire just to get out of a meeting. And I've gotten every one of my bosses fired for things they didn't say or do. Boss: Would he be a good fit? Dilbert: I like what he has to offer.
Tuesday January 02,
2018
Wally Has A Car Problem
Wednesday November 22,
2017
Wally Not Motivated
Tags laziness, motivation, behavior, medical, treatment, blame, accountability, psychology
Transcript
Wally: I need to take a medical leave to recover from my crippling laziness. Boss: Laziness is a behavior problem, not a medical problem. Wally: That would suggest you have not motivated me enough. Boss: Can't be that. It sounds more like you're dying.
Sunday November 12,
2017
Tags prognosticate, prediction, projection, budget, blame
Transcript
Boss: Are your financial projections available? Dilbert: Yes, because I can see into the future. Boss: No one can see into the future. Dilbert: Then why did you ask me if I can do it? Boss: It's your job to predict the outcome of your project. Dilbert: Why would you ask me to do something that no one can do? Boss: I don't need you to be accurate. I only need someone to blame when we go over budget. Dilbert: I saw that coming. Boss: No one like a braggart.
Monday November 06,
2017
Suboptimal Barry Dingle
Tags annoyance, open-door policy, corporate culture, pest
Transcript
Barry: Hi, I'm Barry Dingle. I hang around your office door and ask you questions every time you get off the phone. Boss: I hate that. Barry: You can blame your open-door policy for all of it. Boss: This is sub-optimal.


