Evil Grin Comic Strips - Page 2
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282 Results for Evil Grin
View 11 - 20 results for evil grin comic strips. Discover the best "Evil Grin" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday December 27,
2017
Winning Design Awards
Tags #design, #fragile, #cell phone, #crack, #screen, #evil, #technology
Transcript
Boss: 100 percent of our smartphone buyers dropped and broke their phones within one minute of unboxing them. Despite our slippery materials and brittle design, customers blamed themselves. And we won seven prestigious design awards. CEO: Yes!
Monday December 25,
2017
Beautiful, Slippery, Brittle
Tags #technology, #cell phones, #fragile, #aesthetics, #vanity
Transcript
Boss: When you engineer our new mobile phone product, make sure you adhere to the BSB design principle. Dilbert: BSB? Boss: Beautiful, slippery, brittle. Dilbert: Isn't that sort of evil? Boss: It isn't our fault if customers don't buy an ugly case.
Sunday August 20,
2017
Tags #human resources, #certification, #listening, #corporations, #business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director Of Human Resources. Catbert: Don't bother me. I'm studying for a human resources certification. I already have my certifications for sadism and maniacal laughing. And, obviously, I have the basic HR certification for recreational downsizing. If you don't have that one, you can't even get a job in HR. But I need one more certification to make the big bucks. Now run along while I practice my joyless scowling. Dilbert: You talk a lot about yourself. Catbert: I prefer to think of myself as a non-listener.
Wednesday April 19,
2017
Evil Orc
Saturday April 30,
2016
Dilbert Is Antisocial
Tags #antisocial, #misanthropy, #introvert, #communication, #relationships
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources. Catbert: People are complaining that you're antisocial. Dilbert: I only dislike the people I get to know. Catbert: Then why do you get to know them? Dilbert: It happens by accident when they talk.
Tuesday April 19,
2016
For The Good Of The Country
Tags #apple, #iphone, #technology, #national security, #privacy, #terrorism, #encryption
Transcript
Boss: The government wants us to make software to crack our own encryption. Dilbert: That sounds evil. Boss: It's for the good of the country. Dilbert: Can I test it on your phone? Boss: You'd have to kill me first. Dilbert: That would be two good things for the country.
Wednesday April 06,
2016
Ted Has A Ravine Option
Tags #cruelty, #empathy, #hr, #human resources, #mean, #guest artist, #brenna thummler, #business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director Of Human Resources. Ted: Dilbert said he wants me to drive into a ravine. Catbert: I want that too. I didn't realize it was an option. Ted: Perhaps I have come tot he wrong place. Catbert: I hear good things about the ravine.
Monday September 07,
2015
Employees Should Be Optimists
Tags #optimism, #optimist, #work ethic, #gullible, #trick, #deception
Transcript
Catbert: The Evil Director of Human Resources. Catbert: Ideally, you want all of your employees to be optimists. Because optimists believe anything you tell them. Boss: If you work all weekend, and our profits double in a month, I'll give you a helicopter. Asok: Deal!
Wednesday June 03,
2015
Ceo Delegates From A Distance With Catbert
Tags #punishment, #cat, #throwing, #executives, #animals
Transcript
CEO: I love having a football-sized evil director of Human Resources. Now I can delegate from a distance. Catbert: I sense disgruntled employees in that direction! Launch! CEO: You'll have to walk after the first ten feet.
Tuesday June 02,
2015
Ceo Tosses Catbert
Tags #executive, #ceo, #delegate, #respoinsibilities, #punishment
Transcript
CEO: You have been doing dumb things on social media. I am going to toss our evil director of Human Resources in your direction and run away. I love a lot of things about being CEO, but I think I love delegating the most. Boss: Gaaaa!!!