French Staellite Comic Strips - Page 2

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

21 Results for French Staellite

View 11 - 20 results for french staellite comic strips. Discover the best "French Staellite" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogbert venture capitalist, #word processing, #windows, #interesting concept, #french bread

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in a restaurant with a businessman. The businessman says, "My idea is to develop a word processing program for Windows." Dogbert says, "That's an interesting concept. I wonder if twenty dollars would be enough." The businessman asks, "To start a software company?" Dogbert answers, "No, to pay our waitress to beat you with a loaf of French bread." The waitress enters carrying a loaf of bread.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #45 inch screen, #communications staellite, #cure disease, #fish appear on screen, #great products, #marketing, #new product, #room freshener, #telepathic user, #whiten teeth, #time travel, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

How Great Products are designed The Boss: Go talk to marketing. Dilbert: Groan Dilbert: Dave, tell me what marketing wants the new product to do. Dave: It has to have a 45 inch screen and still fit in a purse or a wallet. Dave: It needs to act as a communications satellite as well as a room fresher. Dilbert: uh... Dave: it must cure deadly diseases and whoyten your teeth while you sleep! HAHA! and it has to be capable of time travel!! and have a telepathic user interface! Slap! Dilbert: I could write a program that makes fish appear on the computer screen, DAVE: yeah a lot of people want that.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #another war, #elbonia, #france, #french embassy, #french stopped bomb, #goading, #nothing worth destroying, #scarp metal

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "...The French stopped bombing Elbonia when they realized there was nothing worth destroying." "Ironically, the GNP of Elbonia tripled by selling the bomb fragments for scrap. When I left they were trying to goad France into another war." "French Embassy" Elbonian: "You call this swill champagne?? If we drank this we'd have to eat snails to get the taste out of our mouths too!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #all get out, #french bombing, #hardy breed, #run, #scare us

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The French are bombin us!! Run!! Elbonians: we elnonians are a hardy breed. Bombs don't scare us. ELBONIAN:'Course id be lying if I told you this didn't sting like all get out. NUPE IT.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #emphasize positive, #french staellite, #trending downward, #upbeat, #war with france, #project staus

View Transcript

Transcript

dilberts letter: "Project status: We accidentally destroyed the French satellite and are now at war with France." Elbonian: "Maybe you should be a little more upbeat in your report. Emphasize the positive." letter: "...on a positive note, our headcount expenses are trending downward."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad timing, #corporate offcie, #declared war, #french embassy, #satellite program, #slingshot

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The corporate office sent me to head up the Elbonian satellite launching program. Elbanian: ooh...bad timing. The french delivered their satellite early. we already tried to launch it with the town slingshot. Dilbert: It doesn't get much worse than this. Elbonain: It flattened the french embassy. They declared war an hour ago.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elbonian division, #launching staellites, #technology, #elbonians

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Our Elbonian division was the low bidder for launching French satellites into orbit. Im putting you personally in charge Make sure they use the right technology. Elbonia OOPS elbonian: I hope those things aren't expensive.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading a book and Dogbert stands on the hassock holding a plate. Dogbert says, "You already own the 'Acorn Series' of Dogbert's Commemorative Plates . . ." Dogbert continues, "For a limited time you may also purchase my new issue: the 'French Guy With a Hat' series." Dogbert has drawn a face on the acorn. Dilbert says, "My acorn plates are missing." Dogbert sits on his pillow thinking, "Tomorrow I'll introduce my new series: 'Russian With French Hat.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #sounds, #less, #million, #times, #french, #short, #tempered, #mockingly

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a short man, "Hi, Les." Les says, "You say that almost mockingly." Les continues, "The way you say it, my name sounds like 'Less.' I've told you a million times it's French -- pronounced 'Lez.'" Dilbert says, "You seem a little short-tempered." Les says, "Hey! That time you did it on purpose!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #woman, #loaves, #bread, #dough, #grocery store, #jimmy, #toaster, #bonded, #post pardom

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a park bench with a woman holding a baby. Dogbert asks, "Why are you hugging that loaf of French bread?" The woman replies, "Hee hee! Yeah, newborn babies do look like loaves of bread." Dogbert says, "But in this case I think your baby IS a loaf of French bread." The woman looks closely at the blanket and says, "That would explain the smell of dough." The woman takes the bread out of the blanket. She says, "Must have been a mix-up at the grocery store." The woman says, "I hope this doesn't mean somebody is sticking little Jimmy in a toaster somewhere." Dogbert replies, "I'm sure he'll pop up." The baby pops out of a shopping bag. The woman says, "Ah, there you are in the grocery bag." The woman says, "I think I bonded with the bread." Dogbert says, "Remind me not to eat hoagies at your house."